Chapter 179 - Trinity - At A Loss (VOLUME 2)
~~
Trinity
~~
Since the moment that I realized I could no longer feel that little flickering warmth inside me, that little light of life I associated with my little Jelly Belly, I felt like I was numb both inside and out. Something was missing. Something was broken. I had failed.
I felt like I had been spiraling out of control, and if it hadn't been for Reece's constant touch I would have already lost it all completely. The entire time we rode from the Aerie Convento I sat on his lap. I didn't want to sit in my seat beside him.
I needed to feel his arms wrapped around me. I needed him to ground me. I needed his warmth.
When we got to the hotel resort we were going to stay at he placed his hand at the small of my back, guiding me as we walked. He never let his hand leave me. I don't know if it was because he knew I needed him, or if he needed me just as much. But I didn't care, I was happy for his touch.
To say that the hotel was surprised to see us was a bit of an understatement. They watched as several people got out covered in gore. And then there was the sheer number of people.
In total, there were nearly a hundred of us with the Warlocks included. And there were so many matching big, black, expensive SUVs. The sight of all of us showing up at once was most definitely overwhelming.
I honestly hadn't thought about what we would look like. A very large group of mostly very tall, and mostly very handsome, men showing up like this. What exactly did they think was happening?
But, nevertheless, I had a sudden inspiration. I asked Noah quickly first to find out what he had said to them.
"Noah, did you tell them anything when you made the reservation?
" I wanted to know what he told them when he had requested enough rooms for a hundred people.
"Just that Alpha Corps was in need of a large scale reservation on very short notice.
"
"Nothing else?
" I whispered.
"Didn't they ask what we needed so many rooms for?
"
"They asked, but I simply chose not to answer.
" He was infuriating at times.
"Seriously.
" I rolled my eyes at him.
"Urgh.
" I growled impatient at him.
"Let me handle this.
"
"What are you going to do?
" Reece asked me curiously.
"Just watch.
" I winked at him with a grin.
I saw the manager of the resort coming our way. Noah, Reece, and I were in the lead after all. He looked a little nervous, but confidence was still shining through. I could tell he was really good at his job. Also, based on his scent, I could tell he was as human as they come.
"Good afternoon.
" He smiled when he was close enough to us.
"My name is Francis and I'd like to welcome you to The Tiger Lily Resort.
" His smile didn't falter but I saw his eyes widen when he noticed the blood that covered both me and Reece.
Good afternoon Francis, I'm Mrs. Trinity Gray.
" I included my full name so that he would know to associate me with the group that Noah had called about.
"I am sorry for this unplanned interruption. We had intended to stay elsewhere, but unfortunately there was an incident with filming.
" I chuckled lightly with the lie.
"Filming.
" He turned his head.
"Yes, quite unfortunate really. But while filming the big fight scene, the house we were using was damaged and we won't be able to stay there.
"
"Oh, you're filming a movie?
" He asked, realization washing over his face.
"Yes, but we've been keeping it under wraps, you see. So I would appreciate it if you were to not let this matter slip to anyone.
" I winked at him.
"This is going to be a big hit and we can't let secrets out. You know how it is.
" He looked confused but nodded like he understood all the same.
"You can count on us.
" He was still nodding with a broad smile.
"We deal with all sorts of celebrities and high profile corporations. And I know that there isn't a business in Colorado that hasn't heard of your husband.
"
"Is that so.
" Reece's deep voice purred next to me.
"I didn't know I was that famous.
" He was grinning at the man who obviously had no idea that the man he had just been talking about was standing in front of him. That reaction from Francis actually made me giggle for a brief second.
"I guess your reputation is more famous than the actual you.
" I slid in close to him to feel his warmth as that brief expression of true emotion which had been quick and fleeting had left me feeling even emptier and more numb in comparison.
"Mr. Gray, I apologize. I knew of you, but I have never had the chance to meet you before. I am honored to be able to host you and your group. Please, do not hesitate to ask for anything.
" Francis seemed a little subservient after that, it really made me wonder how people in the business world view my husband.
Francis summoned a gaggle of excited employees. It seemed that they were excited to be in the presence of Reece. How well known was he outside of our own city? The employees were ladened with guest pamphlets and key cards. They had already assigned Reece and I to a large, luxurious suite, but they asked for us to assign any other 'important' rooms.
Reece assigned rooms of importance to people based on their status and importance to us. So the high ranking warlocks were assigned better rooms, as were my personal guards and friends. And of course those with mates present were given rooms to themselves, so Juniper and Paul were together, as were Rawlynne and David, and of course Dietrich and Shawn.
I had expected Shawn to look nervous and scared or embarrassed at least. But no, he just acted like it was nothing. I was really glad to see his relationship progressing well. No one should have to deal with too much stress in their relationship, trust me on that one.
It didn't even take ten minutes before we were all assigned rooms and we had all scattered to our respective places. The representatives among the group would come and get orders from Reece and myself later, but for now we just needed to relax and get cleaned up.
But there was something that I just hadn't calculated. I hadn't thought about the fact that I was only holding it all together because there were so many people around us. But as the group dwindled down and we made our solitary journey down the hall to our suite, I realized it wasn't just Reece's warmth I had come to rely on today. No, it was the warmth of everyone together.
Everyone who had been present and knew about the baby. Those who lost almost as much as I did with the loss of my baby. Juniper, Noah, Carter, Vincent, David, Shawn, Shane, Dietrich, Paul, Cedar. All these people were part of my daily life. They knew that they would be part of my child's daily life.
They were excited and happy for the upcoming changes. Their excitement had been providing me with a sense of calmness since I found out about the baby. And they were just as devastated that this life had been snuffed out.
The shared pain and sorrow they felt along with me was helping me to cope this whole time. I felt the loss of their shared feelings very distinctively. It was like I had a blackhole sucking away all my emotions.
I knew that Reece was just as upset as I was. I could feel the tension, the anger, the sadness, the sorrow. He had been so excited for everything to do with the baby. I knew he wanted to be a dad, but I had destroyed that dream of his.
The longer I was without that warmth, without the others, the more I began to shake. That numb feeling was spreading and it was like I would never be warm again.
I didn't even notice it when Reece gently put his hand on my shoulder and tried to get my attention. I paid no mind as he guided me to sit on a wooden chair near the sliding glass door. I hadn't even registered what the room actually looked like. I was beginning to run on autopilot.
I was at a loss. I usually knew at least a little of what I should be doing at all times. Most of the time I was quite capable. But now, I didn't know what to do, what to say, what to feel. I was broken, because I failed in my most important job ever. How could I ever save anyone, protect anyone, if I couldn't keep my baby safe?