Chapter 230 - [A Mountain Of War And Death] 15\/?: Healing A

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nI open my eyes as my sight is greeted by beautiful greenery.

nSomething completely different than the cold forests swarming with monsters of the mountains.

nWhat is this place?

nI glance around, just to find the beautiful, and soothing scenery. The wind gently rose through my skin, as the grass was springy and healthy, releasing the smell of plants that I had not felt for very long since I indulged myself into the darkness.

nThe trees are big, towering over five meters, the green leaves slowly move by the wind, as I can feel the sound of birds on the treetops chirping.

nI walk around this mysterious forest, recalling what have I done in the past days.

nOnly darkness takes ahold of my memories.

nWhat was I doing?

nI recall it more now, slowly but steadily, this soothing forest is making me recall.

nThe monstrous being that offered me power in exchange for my soul, in exchange for my heart and my emotions.

nI remember its cracking skull face as it laughed over me, my soul still remembers the terrible pain that it felt when it was grasped by this entity and then enhanced by forbidden magic.

nBut back then, I was happy, I was finally acquiring what I wanted.

nWhere did that lead me?

nNowhere.

nIt only led to my crushing defeat.

nI was drunk by power, and I certainly could not realize the terrible damage I was doing to my soul.

nMy feet grasp the tender grass as I rest near a tree.

nThis place seems strange, it is almost mythical.

nIts sun shines brightly atop the trees, warming my cold body.

nAnd there is an Aura that is slowly making me feel more vigorous and alive… What is happening?

nAm I in a dream?

nI admire the scenery some more, realizing that I might have died and gone somewhere else.

nWhat I remember…

nThe rejection of my father…

nMy weakness…

nMy brother leaving…

nI guess these three things triggered what I did there.

nI can't really say that 'I was being controlled by my desires or rage' or something, I have to be honest, I was just doing it because I wanted to.

nThat entity certainly offered me many things.

nBut I was the one that chose to take them.

nI am rather rotten, I know.

nAnd although it felt so good, and although it made me so exhilarated, it ended up bringing even more suffering to me and my soul.

nThe moment I was about to kill my father, I was filled with joy.

nBut those people had to get in my way.

nSo I also decided to dispose of them… the people that were part of my tribe.

nI do not feel much guilt, but it really does feels kind of strange.

nIt feels as if now that I recall what I did, my mind felt cloudy back then.

nMy brother appeared not long after.

nYes, my brother… the one I had almost forgotten he existed at this point.

nHe came and beat the crap out of me.

nHow did he get so strong?

nAnd then, I lost consciousness as I struggled to escape his metallic claws by some kind of shock of electricity that filled my mind.

nI felt as if I had died back there, but I am here now…

nIs this another world? Heaven?

nNo, I might actually be in a dream.

nI pinch my hand and feel no pain.

nJust as I thought… a dream of sorts.

nOr is it?

nJust where… could this place be?

nMy wicked mind would never allow for such a soothing and beautiful place to appear within my dreams.

nThat entity would not let me have them either… Now that I remember, did I even sleep since I made a contract with him?

nNot at all, it was as if I had infinite stamina, I kept practicing magic, devouring dead spirits, and raising the dead almost endlessly.

nMy devotion for that entity had grown almost to fascination, I really was not me a bit back there, although I still am an arrogant person, I cannot believe I was being such as crazed fanatic for that entity.

nIt gave me power and all, but for real?

nThat was most likely some kind of brainwashing.

nAlthough I do not regret what I did, I do regret being a fanatic of that thing. It feels almost surreal now.

nI sigh as I rest my head in the tree trunk, the sunlight slowly bathes my weak and frail body, it feels like a warm blanket over my body.

nThe tree trunk is not so hard, and this makes me even more relaxed.

nThis is… way too relaxing.

nI feel as if my mind will fall into slumber again…

nIs this… what I want?

nTo just… be in a soothing place for the rest of my life?

nI am… tired.

nI am tired of everything…

nThis life…

nThis world…

nSigh…

nI just want to remain here forever…

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"You can't do that, sorry…

"

nA sudden voice resonates within the forest, it was the voice of… a boy?

nI glance in front of me, as my eyes see the figure of what a boy on his four to five years of age could be.

nHis skin is pale white, his eyes crimson red, his hair black with white strands, and he has a look that seems to be completely expressionless on his face.

nI am a bit startled, from where did he came from?

nI could not notice his presence at all, how did he get near me so fast like that?

nIt makes me worry, I try to stand up, but I feel too relaxed, my body does not respond to me as I want to.

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"Don't worry, you're in a good place,

" said the kid.

nA good place? What do you mean? How does he know this?

nI try to speak but my voice cant gets out of my mouth, the kid's crimson eyes staring blankly at me send shivers down my spine.

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"Am I that scary…?

" muttered the kid, glancing at the floor.

nHuh? What kind of response is that?

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"I am not scared of you…!

" I say, as the words, I want to say finally come out of my mouth.

nThe boy mildly smiles as he nods.

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"Thanks for saying that, I feel more reassured,

" said the kid.

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"Is that so…? Hm…? Do I know you from somewhere?

" I ask.

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"No, you never have seen me directly, but I helped the people you damaged to heal back through my Aura of Healing, so perhaps you were able to feel my presence when I did it at the moment you fought Gaius-san,

" says the kid.

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"Is that… so? Huh? You! Are you…? Ah… Wait, where am I?!

" I ask in desperation, I want to know where the heck I am!

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"You're currently sleeping, this is within your dreams and mind,

" says the kid.

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"And why… are you here then?

" I ask.

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"Because I am making it possible for you to dream this,

" he said.

nWhat? He is… manipulating my dream?

nThis… what is he? A human? No, he seems strangely demonic.

nWell, whatever he is… How can he even do this?

nAs if reading my mind, he answers.

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"I am a half-demon. And yeah, I can manipulate these dreams through the manipulation of your mind within your soul. You're in this place because it is the most soothing for your mind, which is undergoing healing at this moment…

" he says.

nAs he drops these words, I remember the excruciating pain that my soul went by as it inflated like a balloon with all the dead spirits I had accumulated and exploded, freeing them all.

nThis pathetic display happened right in the middle of my fight against my brother, what kind of luck is this?

nIf I had known that this would have happened to me, I wouldn't have taken the contract with the entity.

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"Is that… so? Why? Why are you healing my soul?

" I ask. I was curious about why this kid, seemingly an enemy of mine, would do this.

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"Because you need healing, why wouldn't I heal you?

" he asks.

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"Why? Don't tell me that you're doing this purely out of the goodwill?

" I ask. That is impossible, no one would do something like healing their enemy.

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"Yes, I am doing it because, although you are at fault for many things, I think that you deserve a second chance. Some people still love you, Azra. Such as Ragdaz and Gaius. I am already attached to them, and I do not want to see them suffer any longer. They had gone through their good share of suffering already,

" said the kid.

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"That's… my father and my brother? Are you kidding me? They love me?! Hah! What a good joke!

"

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"It is not a joke, Azra, stop being so immature and realize that the people that love you are waiting for you to get better. You have never been alone, you always had a family. Perhaps the circumstances made you feel as if you didn't have, but now that they're all willing to come back to you, don't waste this opportunity… I wish… I wish I had such an opportunity with all my beloved people that died…

"

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"You… What? I… I…

"

nI cannot speak any longer as my mind flows with many memories of my father and brother, against my will, I am made to remember the bonds and the good things I had gone through with them…

nMy brother's cooking and cheerful nature.

nHe was always cheering me all the time, helping me develop my crafting skills, and always brought a bright and harmonious atmosphere to all our dinners.

nHe was dependable and I never felt sad at his side.

nThe overprotectiveness of my father, that always made me feel secure.

nAlthough my father… did not like what I did, and even called me a weakling that needed to train instead of crafting, he would always wear the things I made for him.

nWait, why did I forget this?

nHe always said that what I did was useless… but he always wore what I made for him?

nAnd now that I recall… he even used the potions I made… and the medicine too…

nThen… Why don't I remember this?

nWas I…?

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"Do you recall them now? Various memories within your mind and soul had been contaminated by the Necromancer's curse, but we are slowly destroying them… You should be able to recall more things as we go on…

" said the kid.

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"That's… my father… my brother… I… I was really an idiot…

"

nMy mind keeps flowing with many good memories one after another.

nI glance at the sky, as my eyes begin to release rivers of tears.

nWhat is this feeling?

nWhy do I feel so sad?

nAh… I… I miss them so much…

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