Yu Dong felt her heart go all stuffy, she didn't want to hurt either of them but even if she tried her best someone would get hurt, no matter how much she tried to protect them, in the end, she was the one who will end up hurting her husbands the most. She could protract them from the villagers but who will protect them from the loneliness that they have to suffer because of her? Looks like what she was doing wasn't enough. She cupped Shen Li's face, her eyes carefully tracing the tear streaks on his cheeks, it was only then did she saw that his eyes were red and slightly swollen and just like that a knife twisted in her chest.

She wiped his tears, as she kissed his eyes and softly murmured

" Don't love me so much, I am not worthy of your love, Li. I can give you anything you want but I can't give you-

"

" The one thing that I want the most?

"Shen Li tilted his head so that his face was resting against the palm of her hand. With his half undone shirt and tears in his eyes, he was a sight to behold. Like a seductive fox, he not only imprinted in her mind but also somehow successfully sneaked in her heart and made a comfy place for himself in there without her noticing anything. The sight of his tears made her feel like she was the scum out of all scums, right now she couldn't help but feel her protective instinct getting worst and worst, she just wanted to lock him up and put him in her pocket, so that no one would see this beautiful sight ever.

" Shen Li, I-

" Yu Dong began but Shen Li didn't let her speak, he leaned up and pressed his lips against her in a soft kiss before pulling back

" I know that I can never have you all to myself, you don't have to feel guilty about it. I too was selfish back then because I couldn't suffer the torture and didn't fight back when mother in law said that she was bringing another husband for my wife… I didn't regret not fighting back then but now-

" he looked down, hiding his face as more and more tears trickled down from his eyes

" if I knew that one day I will be repaid for all my sufferings, that God would one day send you to me, I would have happily let that Yu Dong kill me because it would have hurt a lot less, Dong Dong

"

Yu Dong's eyes burned as she took Shen Li in her arms, feeling something warm trickle down her cheeks too

" I am sorry, I am so sorry, Li

"

Shen Li shook his head as he hugged her back

" you don't need to apologize, it's me. It's me who cannot control his feelings, I am an embarrassment as your first husband. I can smile in front of everyone, I can support my brothers when they want… I can accept everything but my heart just won't stop hurting. I-

"

Shen Li didn't get the chance to complete his sentence as Yu Dong knotted his hair in her fingers and kissed him, putting as much of her emotions in that one kiss as she could, she was a failure as their wife. She wanted their hearts but didn't think of the responsibilities that came with it. Shen Li loved her, she knew it … but every time she was with someone else, he would always smile. In fact, he would act as her partner and the perfect husband, he would control the playful Mi and take care of the reserved Liu… he would always smile at her, never once complained and she took it for granted that he was fine, but she never knew that behind his smiling face he was slowly breaking down.

Shen Li put his hands on her shoulder before trailing his fingers down, she could feel his fingers tremble as he touched her. Pulling back, she took hold of his wrist and kissed the heel of his palm before biting it lightly

" from now on stop holding back, if you don't want to smile, you don't have to, if it hurts- just tell me, I can't promise that I will be able to take away all your pain but I will do my best to make you forget it.. even if it's just for a little while

"

Shen Li's eyes widened before his lips curled in a soft smile

" This is why I can't stop loving you… you are always so honest. Never making a fake promise

"

Yu Dong nibbled on each of his fingers, biting on the one where he would have worn a wedding ring if they met in the modern world. She bit hard enough to leave a mark before dipping closer and licking a patch on his neck

" Why will I make fake promises? When I know that I won't be able to fulfil it for you… am I not hurting you enough?

"

She wrapped her arms around in his waist before lifting him up in the air and laying him down on the floor before hooking her fingers in the strings of his pants and pulling them down together with his underpants, this time he didn't shy away and even spread his legs a little wide, Yu Dong had no idea how to tell him that how much his little submissive acts turned her on. She stroked his member that was soaking wet and grinned

" did you relief yourself last night?

"

Shen Li blushed all the way up to his chest as he shook his head but then Yu Dong inserted a finger in his ting opening and chuckled in amusement

" Liar, are you this slick just from some kisses? I remember it quite well, you mers find it hard to get wet, so how are you so slick?

"

Shen Li pursed his lips, as he bit on his bottom lip. When he didn't say anything, Yu Dong grinned as she leaned down her cheek brushing against his

" were you thinking of me? What did you think of?

"