Chapter 151 – Adult Goods
“Night attendance!?”
Who do you think you are? An empress calling for her male attendants? How can you easily say those lines without being embarrassed. Your world view is not even in the same dimension as mines!
Ai Mi tilted her head and looked at me with a strange look.
“What? You don’t understand? It’s classical Chinese that I just learned, I want you to stand by my side and protect my sleep! Are you not willing to?”
Who taught you that classical Chinese! Even the PE teacher won’t teach you something that abnormal! So, you were asking me to stand guard at your bedside? There should be a limit to your orders! I still have to go to school tomorrow!
I kicked the slippers on the floor back to Ai Mi. She had to be more self-reliant, she should go wherever she wanted to go with her own efforts and not depend on someone else to carry her there.
Ai Mi pouted while wearing her slippers. She headed towards my bedroom with her ponytail shaking behind her head.
She opened my bedroom door without even asking. Then she turned on the light and curiously inspected the furnishings in my room.
Needless to say, huge movie posters of “Fist of Fury” and “First Blood” takes up your entire view. Other than an ordinary single bed, there was also a variety of easily obtainable fitness products.
Hey, can you learn some manners?! I don’t want others to know my hobbies and secrets, especially you!
“I can’t believe you still watch Stallone’s films, are you an old man?” Ai Mi patrolled my room like a guard, and the sandbag that was hung in the middle of the room peaked her interest.
“Huh? This thing seems fun…” Her eyes were ignited with the flame of curiosity. She mimicked a boxer and picked up her fists. Then she forcefully punched the sandbag while shouting “Die, bastard!”.
“It hurts!” Ai Mi held her injured right hand that was deflected by the sandbag. The padded canvas sandbag did not budge, seemingly laughing at Ai Mi’s weakness and stupidity.
“You won’t be able to move it.” I said from behind.
“Nonsense! I’ll hit it again!” Ai Mi started to compete with the inanimate sandbag. After throwing several punches and kicks, she grabbed onto the sandbag with both her arms like a swing with a lot of pent up force!
It seems she actually succeeded. The sandbag swayed backwards slightly as if it had been shaken by Ai Mi.
“Ha ha ha ha ha, look! Behold my might!” Ai Mi smiled very proudly with both hands on her hips.
“Ahh—!!” The sandbag quickly rebounded and smacked Ai Mi’s face.
“Ow ow ow ow ow!” Ai Mi held her bruised nose and kneeled down on the floor. Unfortunately, the place she chose to kneel was extremely inappropriate. The sandbags that swung like a pendulum quickly swayed back again, hitting the back of Ai Mi’s head.
She fell down on the floor in a daze.
I laughed. Ai Mi was pretty dumb, she did not have a speck of athleticism.
She stayed sprawled on the ground for 4 or 5 seconds. When I was going to help her up, she jumped up in a single breath with a look of anger and humiliation.
“You dare hurt me! I sentence you to death!” She shouted at the sandbag, “I’ll execute your family! I’ll wipe out your descendants!”
She raised one foot and planned to kick it again. But after thinking about it, she put her foot down, perhaps she was afraid of the rebound.
“Manservant, I’m buying this sandbag!” she said seriously.
“Ah? What are you buying it for?”
“I’m buying it so Peng TouSi and the bodyguards can give it a beating to help me vent my anger!” Ai Mi looked at the sandbags as if her vengeance will soon be fulfilled.
“I’m not selling it! I have to use it every day! I don’t want to switch to a new one after I’m already used to this one!” I refused.
“You use it every day?” Ai Mi looked at me suspiciously, then she looked at the sandbag. “That means you hit it every day?”
After thinking for a moment, Ai Mi continued:
“I guess that also works since you’re considered as my manservant. You can punish it in my stead!”
“You haven’t hit it yet today, right? Hit it now! I want to watch you hit it!”
Ai Mi stamped her feet.
Every night after dinner, I would punch the sandbag a couple hundred times. It felt good working up a swat, and I always felt it was more fulfilling than writing homework. I had no reason to not complete one of my daily tasks. Ai Mi could watch from the sides if she wanted.
I took off my T-shirt and revealed the tight black vest that was underneath. It felt pretty good to tighten my muscles and it also filled me up with fighting spirit.
Ai Mi consciously moved away because she does not want to be hit by the sandbag again. She stood in the corner while cheering for me.
I lowered my shoulders and slightly bent my knees.
I delivered a punch with a woosh!
The sandbag was sent flying and it almost hit the ceiling.
I added a left hook against the momentum of the sandbag as it was falling back down and sent it spinning. The chain rubbed together to create a metallic clash sound that sounded beautiful to my ears.
Three hit combo! I would definitely be sent to juvie if I used this move on someone’s abdomen.
I don’t know why, but the I hit the sandbag with much more proficiency than usual. It seems as if I was actually teaching a lesson to the bad guy who bullied Ai Mi.
It might have been because I was too fierce and I used too much force, so sweat already started to form on my arms and shoulders after thirty or so hits.
Thus I stood up and stabilized the swaying sandbag. I decided to end the training early today.
Ai Mi stood with her hands separated for a while, as if she wanted to applaud, but forgot because she was fascinated.
“You stink!” Ai Mi said unexpectedly after a while. “Huh?”
Ai Mi covered her small nose. “I only told you to punish the sandbag, who told you to sweat! Now the whole room stinks even more of men! Go take a shower!”
She said while she put both her hands on my back and pushed me out of the room. Although she didn’t have much strength, it was still ticklish.
“Make sure you wash yourself clean!” she said. “Although Peng TouSi doesn’t have a great appearance, he still pays a lot of attention to personal hygiene. You can’t fall behind as my manservant!”
No **! He’s a homo and he’s number 0! Who would want him if he doesn’t pay attention to hygiene! Not only does he bathe often, he probably also sprays himself with cologne!
In the end, I asked Ai Mi to sit still and eat chips while watching TV. I went to the bathroom to shower after she promised she wouldn’t wander and look through the house.
After I came out wearing a T-shirt and shorts, I found that the TV was still on, but Ai Mi was gone.
I went looking for her in my room in anger, it was empty. My dad’s study room was also empty.
A strange buzzing sound came from the door of the big bedroom.
I opened the door of the big bedroom with a bad premonition.
I have said before that the big bedroom used to be my parents’ bedroom. Ever since my dad’s life was ruined, no one sleeps there. Half of the room was used to store goods.
Goods for the Happy Love Shop.
More than two hundred boxes of adult goods.
Because Dad just sent away an order for a customer, there were several open boxes laying around.
Now these boxes have been completely rummaged through. Many unsightly men and women self-pleas** tools were scattered on the floor. Clearly, this was not the work of my dad.
The vibrating sound was still really loud. I turned with despair towards Ai Mi, who was laying down on the big bed.
She was leaned back against the pillow and was in a comfortable position that was halfway between sitting up and lying down. A pink love egg was vibrating fiercely between her fingers. It was brand new, but she installed two batteries so she could figure out how to use it.
She held the vibrating egg in one hand and the controller in the other hand. Both hands were held in front of the eyes while she read the instructions on the back of the controller.
Damn, you can’t play with that! How could I forget that this room was filled with shameful stuff like this! I should have covered it up beforehand!
After she saw me come in with an expression like it was the end of the world, she was unconcerned. She first smirked and then said:
“So, the manservant’s family does this kind of business! I pretty much got the gist last time when I heard you say “Happy Love Store” on the phone, but it was as I expected!”
The expression on her face was even more pleased than Sherlock Holmes after he solved a hundred cases.
“You, can’t play with that thing! Put it down!”
Blood rushed to my face and I shouted at Ai Mi.
“Why can’t I play with it?” Ai Mi snorted. “I saw this in my mother’s drawer, it was under the drawer of where she keeps her gun. I took it and used it to play with the cat, but she scolded me and as punishment I had to play two hours more of piano!”
Her face darkened after reminiscing about her past.
“Isn’t it just an adult toy? What’s so good about it! I could play with anything you guys play with!”
She said, then she put the vibrating egg on her chest.
Don’t put it there! Did you finally figure out the correct way to use it after studying the instructions? How would my dad feel if he found out a minor was using our store’s product to *** herself on his wedding bed!
I strode forward and snatched the egg away in an instant.
Ai Mi’s expression immediately changed to that of a Queen who was offended by a soldier.
“Who told you take it away? I was just starting to feel good!”
Good feeling? Americans sure are open! You don’t even have a tiny bit of modesty! Did you come to my home just to pursue pleasure?
“It feels a bit numb…” Ai Mi pondered about the pleasant feeling, she suddenly blushed, but in my opinion, most of it was due to excitement, not embarrassment.
“So that’s how you use it!” Ai Mi jumped up and tried to take back the love egg in my hand. “Give it to me! Playing with this is one of my childhood dreams! It is one of the one hundred things I must do before I die! It’s not like you’re my mother’s henchman, don’t worry about me!”
I angrily turned off the love egg and also removed the batteries and threw them on the floor.
“I told you to watch TV and not wander around! How can I sell this now that you opened the packaging!”
I put on an expression of blame.
“You could sell it to me!” Ai Mi smiled and stretched out her fingers and did one sweep around the room. “I’ll take all of these boxes! I’ll tell Peng TouSi to move them back tomorrow and I’ll play with them one by one!”
Screw your play! Other than female toys, there are also men’s toys, gay men’s toys, lesbian toys, fetish toys… Are you trying to create some kind of sex party by buying all of them! Are you suffering from sex addiction like the other American celebrities at such a young age!
“You…you’re not sleeping in the big room! You’ll sleep in my room, I’m going to sleep here!”
“Stingy!” Ai Mi snorted and jumped off the double bed. When she passed by, I saw that she had another unopened love egg in her hand. She carefully hid it in her hand and made a futile attempt to sneak it past me.
I slapped the back of her hand and she opened her hands with a shriek. The love egg that was in a plastic container dropped to the ground.
“You shouldn’t use these things!” I reprimanded her, but it looks like she did not repent, so I felt that I should change my approach.
“Uh, Ai Mi, actually, these adult toys are only used by failures, they’re not for successful people like you.”
“Huh?” Ai Mi never really heard my approach before. “Are you saying my mother punished me because I accidentally saw her toys that are only used by failures?”
“Pretty much!” I said, “In short, you can’t touch these things again, or you will be infected with the smell of a failure!”
Ai Mi smelled her hand with worry. After confirming that there was no scent of a failure, she raised her head in relief.
“Then — what toys do successful people play with?” she asked suddenly.
“Ah?” I was not prepared.
“Successful people, successful people…” Ai Mi knitted her brows and thought for a long time, finally she happily put both hands together after making a realization.
“Ha ha ha ha ha ha — I’m a genius! Successful people don’t need toys that mimic the human body, successful people play with real people!”
She licked her lips ravenously. The gaze she used to look at me was similar to the gaze she used to look at chips in the supermarket, or when she looked at the love egg.