Chapter 232 – Ketchup

I let you choose a method of punishment for yourself, but it seems you can’t really get away from stripping naked or the bed.

Not sure why I had a sudden heated disturbance in my crotch, but I could not stand up for the time being. These casual shorts are really thin and it would be exposed.

Thus I sat at the table and ate fries dipped in ketchup with Xiao Qin. She was gleefully waiting for the time when she would be punished.

By the way, my dad went to write educational materials and Auntie Ren is working overtime tonight. It’s a bit dangerous with only me and Xiao Qin here!

What am I even thinking about? I’ve had a lot of lust ever since my life was threatened. Even if the person in front of me was the one who had me under her feet numerous times, my blood vessels would still dilate! My brain is automatically trying to recall where the condoms for our store are placed! The voice in my head is saying: Does it even matter if she’s the Little Tyrant? Won’t you fulfill your revenge as long as you press her body under yours?

Bastard, you’re still nonchalantly eating fries? Don’t you realize you’re about to lose your virginity to me? I might ravage you like a wild beast in heat!

I suddenly remembered the time when Auntie Ren suspected I had raped her daughter and looked everywhere for blood stains.

Not good! Auntie Ren warned me before that I could at most only kiss Xiao Qin before high school (which means the French Kiss is already the upper bound of the rules set by Auntie Ren). If I suddenly broke the restrictions set by Auntie Ren, she would definitely punish me. Didn’t she say she would burst my dad’s balls if I made Xiao Qin pregnant?

I made a difficult decision in order to save my father’s balls: I’ll chase Xiao Qin out after she finishes eating the fries! I won’t be able to hold back if she stays any longer!

Even though I had already made a resolution, I had no idea why I was standing naked under the showers with only a door between me and Xiao Qin.

Thinking back on it, the reason why this was the outcome was probably because Xiao Qin added more ketchup to the plate.

As if she was able to realize I was about to chase her out, Xiao Qin opened three packs of ketchup at once (newly opened restaurants are really generous). She was about to add it to the plate but she didn’t keep her chair steady enough, so she was about to fall backwards on the chair with the ketchup and about to cause a huge mess.

All martial artists train their strength, how would you have such terrible balance if you were trained by Auntie Ren since young? If you add the four chair legs to your legs, that would be six legs. You might as well reincarnate into a caterpillar if you can’t even keep your balance with six legs! At least a caterpillar would have more legs!

I could immediately tell what Xiao Qin is thinking.

She wanted to dirty her clothes with ketchup (Ketchup would look like bloodstains on a white shirt). That means she could stay at my home by simply saying she has no clothes and ask if she could stay until her clothes dry.

She could even ask to use the shower if ketchup gets on her hair and that would be even more troublesome!

Why would I let you get your way? I made a prompt decision and caught on to her wrists to prevent her from falling any further. Then I used my other hand to send the three packs of ketchup in Xiao Qin’s hand flying.

I was proud of myself, but who knew the ketchup would quickly fall down again. One pack hit my head, one pack landed on my T-shirt, and one pack landed on my shorts.

Three consecutive hits. The bright red sauce made it seems as if I was struck three times by Japs in a war drama.

“Ah! Ye Lin classmate, you should be more careful!” Xiao Qin made an innocent expression and said with a smile:

“Please let your girlfriend help you clean it!”

She took out a handkerchief from her pocket (it had a Hello Kitty design) and wen straight for the stain on my pants.

Damn it, did you not see the clear red splotches on my chest and head! You had to go for my rocket launcher!

I didn’t let Xiao Qin touch my sensitive spots and walked towards the bathroom.

“I have to wash out the ketchup, you can go home first!”

I ordered Xiao Qin through the bathroom door.

“What! You’re too wasteful!”

“Huh? Wasteful? What am I wasting?”

“You can still use the ketchup stuck on your body! I was looking forward to dipping the fries in the ketchup that’s on your body!”

What? Are you trying to copy the Japs but use me as a male serving plate instead of nyotaimori?

“Also, water is a limited resource. It’s too selfish to take a shower whenever you please!”

Eh? Are you telling me to sleep with ketchup on me? When did you become as frugal as the class leader? But the class leader loves cleanliness, so she would immediately take a shower if she had sticky stuff on her hair. She would not worry about the limited amount of water on earth!

“But… Ye Lin classmate, in order to save water and support the arduous residents of the Sahara Desert, you should take a shower with your girlfriend~~~~”

Huh? You made it sound so dignified, but this was still your goal?

I abruptly remembered the lock to our bathroom was broken. If Xiao Qin barged in naked, I would have nowhere to go and forced to undergo naked combat.

I have visualized the final fight between me and the Little Tyrant many times, but it was definitely not an R-rated scene.

“Xiao Qin, don’t come in!” I sternly warned, “If you barge in, I’ll definitely remove you from the girlfriend position! I always keep my word!”

“Okay…” Xiao Qin replied with disappointment, “I’ll just slowly finish the rest of the fries while listening to Ye Lin classmate shower!”

“Who let you listen to me shower while eating! Hurry up and finish eating then get out of here! I’m not in a good enough mood to do homework!”

Xiao Qin complained with a loud sound.

“But you promised you would do homework with me! Didn’t you say you always keep your word?”

“Hmph!” I scrubbed shampoo on my hair while shouting through the door, “And you also promised you would bring brother Optimus Prime!”

“But… Ye Lin classmate is a man, I’m only a fragile girl! How is it the same? Also, the mafia had too much firepower! Rocket launchers and submachine guns are too scary! I had no choice!”

Again with the mafia lie? Are you not growing tired of it! I focused on cleaning my back and ignored her.

Xiao Qin acted coquettishly towards me:

“No no no~~~ I’m not leaving! You promised you would do your homework with me! You made a promise! You have to do it with me, do it with me! I want to do it alone with Ye Lin classmate! The last time we did it together with the class leader, so it doesn’t count!”

Can you add the word ‘homework’ to your sentences? You already made me so mad!

“Stop being noisy!” I said angrily, “I’ll never do homework with you anymore if you keep being annoying! The class leader and Gong CaiCai both have better grades than you, so I’ll go to them the next time I need to do my homework!”

I realized I forgot to bring a change of clothes since I was in a rush, and it would not be suitable to go out with a towel wrapped around me.

Thus I authorized Xiao Qin to help me get some clothing from my wardrobe.