Chapter 39 Alex and the Demon Lord in the heart

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nLight

nDark

n“Ah, a message came. Let’s see here… ‘The black haired one there is Hikaru’…?” (Alex)

nAlex tapped something in midair and said that.

nI ended up looking at Alex unconsciously from that.

nOur gazes clash.

n—Kusukusu.

n—Kyakkyakkya.

nThe relaxing atmosphere until now made a complete turn.

nPiercing gazes and sneers I felt were coming from somewhere.

nCold sweat ran down my back.

nThe two party members of Alex were also looking dubiously over here.

nThey are looking over here with eyes as if saying ‘who is this guy?’, and my body is paralyzed I can’t even move.

nAt some unknown point in time, it seems I have begun feeling a strong fear towards gazes.

nI am probably growing blue and red in an amusing way.

nEven though I dipped in hot water, my whole body feels cold.

nMy fingers are trembling, and even though I want to run away, my body isn’t responding.

n“Hikaru…? You are that Hikaru? The chinese guy?” (Alex)

nAlex spoke to me.

nLooks like he didn’t hear about me and Nanami from messages, he spoke to me normally.

n…No, thinking about it normally, there’s no way he didn’t.

nIt might just be me being too self-conscious here, but I was the highest ranked in viewers among the 1,000 Chosen. Those numbers wouldn’t have been possible without the matter of Nanami.

nEven so, I don’t have the courage to throw that topic in.

nMore importantly, I am currently in a mental state where it would be hard to even make simple responses here.

n“…I am japanese.” (Hikaru)

nWhen I answered that, Alex made a happy expression. He closed the distance to me.

n“Hoh, a japanese person! This is my first time meeting a Chosen! I am Jack Alexander Fox! I came from Ontario, Canada. I am mostly called Alex.” (Alex)

n“I-I see.” (Hikaru)

n“I didn’t know left and right being suddenly sent to a parallel world, but I was shocked that it was really a world like those of movies. Ain’t that the same for you too, Hikaru?” (Alex)

n“Y-Yeah…” (Hikaru)

n“I thought I would be fine going to a place where I don’t have a single acquaintance, but it was actually pretty rough. But I got messages from my friends saying I can just go to the guild and make comrades, and I am somehow managing like that. Are you alone, Hikaru?” (Alex)

n“Well, yeah…I guess.” (Hikaru)

n“I see. They do say japanese people are stoic after all.” (Alex)

nAlex was a cheerful guy.

nI could see pure happiness as if he had met someone of the same village from that friendly smile of his.

nBut I couldn’t take that sincerely.

n“I had a lot of friends in our world that wanted to go visit Japan. You have a lot of anime and manga, right?” (Alex)

n“Well…yeah.” (Hikaru)

n“Hm…? You don’t look well. Are you okay?” (Alex)

n“Y-Yeah…no problems.” (Hikaru)

nThe 3 were looking at me.

nAnd most of all, Alex’s viewers and my viewers together definitely make up several millions of people.

nEveryone is watching this encounter with amusement.

nWhen I think about that, I can’t even have a conversation.

n“Oi oi, are you from the same place as Alex? You said your name was Hikaru, right? He said he came from a parallel world, but is that true?”

nEven his companions were joining the conversation now, and I was honestly at my limit.

n“Sorry…I have business to attend to. Can we talk about this at another time?” (Hikaru)

n“Oh, is that so? Sorry for suddenly speaking to you. There’s no people here that I can talk about Earth with, you see. I come here every now and then, so let’s talk again!” (Alex)

n“…Yeah.” (Hikaru)

nAlex was a good guy till the end.

nI felt embarrassed about myself and left the public bathhouse as if running away.

nNo, I actually did run away.

n◇◆◆◆◇

nI left the public bathhouse, returned to the inn, and lied down there as if collapsing onto it.

n(I should have spoken more normally.) (Hikaru)

nI didn’t kill Nanami. I was suddenly chosen to be transferred to the parallel world…no, you could even say I was dragged into it. To put it bluntly, I am a victim.

nThere’s no need for me to be so distant.

nAnd yet, I ran away.

nEven though I could have made proper conversation.

nHe could have understood my circumstances.

nAnd yet, I ended up running away as if I felt guilty about something.

n“Aaaaaaaahhh!!” (Hikaru)

nI escaped from it.

nEven though it was a Chosen from Earth I finally met.

nEven though he was a comrade who faced the same hardship as me.

nI ended up escaping that place while speaking practically nothing.

nI was scared.

nMy heart was churning at the thought of speaking with a stranger, and most of all, the moment I was bathed by attention, I lost my sense of self.

nThe moment those rude gazes of strangers began gathering at me, my vision flickered, and my head went completely blank.

nMy heart rampaged, blood rushed my head, the tips of my limbs went numb, and just standing there was taking my all.

nIt was impossible to speak properly there.

nEven so, if I had pushed myself to talk there, I am sure tears would have fallen before words came out.

nIt must also be because I hadn’t prepared myself mentally.

nIt was sudden, and I barely managed to hide it.

nI hate it.

nBright places, and righteousness.

nI wasn’t like this before coming to this world.

nI was more normal.

n…I was, and yet…

nHe should know that I am being suspected of killing my childhood friend.

nAnd yet, he spoke to me as if he didn’t know about it.

nDid we meet by coincidence?

nOr maybe he was being notified of my every action, my location at all times, and came to check me out while pretending it was a coincidence?

nMy imagination was running in bad directions.

nThere’s no way I can see the truth with just that degree of a conversation.

nI don’t know anything.

nI don’t know, but I am being hated, and all the Chosen can become my enemies; that alone, I know.

nI am aware that I have become a pessimist.

nI don’t know when I was warped in this manner.

nWas it at the time when I got out of the forest and read those horrible messages for the first time?

nOr maybe when I hid in the dungeon, scavenged for bodies, and sold them to the black market?

nWas it when I sold those Spirit Stones that were once humans, and bought sustenance with that money?

nOr was I always that kind of person?

nAnyways, everyone is laughing at this sight of me.

nThey are all wishing for me to fail.

nWhen I was laughing weirdly, when I was awkwardly responding…

nWaiting for me to die pathetically.

nLaughing, saying ‘Don’t try talking as if you are on the same standing even though you are Hikaru’.

n‘You are a small man that has been hiding in the darkness and living sneakily in the dungeon. An inferior being that’s different from the others that are living a proper life, right?’, they would say while laughing mockingly.

n…I understand it.

nThey are all just delusions that I myself am just creating.

nAnd yet, voices were coming from the depths of my heart.

n<>

nAnd that’s how I just freeze.

nI was enveloped by a pitch black something in the depths of my heart, and I ended up not being able to move at all. I lose my ability to speak.

nA demon lord is living in my heart.

n“Uuugh…!” (Hikaru)

nI should have spoken more.

nAlex might have properly listened to me.

nHe might have been able to explain to the viewers.

nEven if he knew about the incident, he might have believed me.

nHe might have become my friend.

n—Ahaha.

n—Ufufufu.

n…No, my thinking in that way in itself might be my weakness.

nWhat if he believes me and the situation worsens?

nI don’t even know about Alex either. He might have only looked like a nice guy because it was our first meeting.

nHe is a Chosen, so he must be strengthening himself with Points too. He could snap me with his arms like a twig.

nWith this meeting, countless messages about me will reach him, and his mind might change into seeking my death.

n“…Yeah…” (Hikaru)

nAfter tossing and turning on the bed for a whole hour, my mind steadily grew calmer.

nThat’s fine.

nActing that way was fine.

nThere’s nothing but risks in Chosen acquaintances.

nI was about to make the wrong choice from my desire for human interaction.

nI am not wrong.

n—Hahaha.

n—Kusukusukusu.

nI hear laughing from somewhere.

nSomeone is laughing at my foolishness.

nIt is fine.

nLaugh all you want.

nI am the fool, Kurose Hikaru.

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