I had a much easier time falling asleep after comforting myself with those thoughts. It was peaceful and long. I didn't wake up until I started to hear stirrings in the room. Someone was here. I slowly opened my eyes to see Noah. Or more precisely, his back. He left the room with clothes in hand. He must have just gotten back from the game.

I closed my eyes and decided to rest my eyes until he came back.

I must have dozed off, because it felt like seconds had only passed by until I heard him come back. I sat up and found him pulling out his homework from his backpack.

He heard me moving and looked up.

"Oh, did I wake you? Sorry.

" His eyes were slightly red like they've been rubbed or maybe even from crying.

I squinted at him.

"Are you okay?

"

He touched his eyes as if there were tears to wipe away.

"Ah. This? I'm fine. Good.

"

I lifted an eyebrow.

"I...I didn't play well today...

" He mumbled, hanging his head in depression.

"Oh. I'm sorry.

" I told him.

"What was the score?

"

"3-2.

" He mumbled under his breath.

"Oh. That's a close one.

" I said, getting up.

"Not close enough.

" He sighed.

"It was 3-2. Them. They won. We lost at home. For the first time this season.

"

Ohhhh. That explains the crying. I was up, out of bed, so I went over to pat his shoulder.

"I'm sorry.

"

"It's okay. It's not your fault.

" He wiped his eyes again.

"Don't be lying!

" Kyle yelled, making us jump. He pointed at me.

"How dare you take a sick day! And in the middle of the week?! Have some shame!

"

Shame? I tilted my head and thought about it. I guess it could be my fault then. I wasn't there. I didn't do anything to help...in fact I probably made things worse since I couldn't warn Coach ahead of time that I wasn't going to be there. I gulped.

"Stop that.

" Dave hit Kyle from behind, smacking him on the head.

"Mom and Dad will ground you for life if they heard you.

" He looked into our room.

"Don't listen to his crap, Jake. He's just mad that he couldn't do anything for the team either.

"

Kyle rubbed his head.

"You didn't have to hit me. He knows I was just joking.

"

"No way. Jake takes everything seriously.

"

"What do you guys want?

" Noah glared at them with his reddened eyes.

"Mom said dinner is almost ready so I was sent up here to wake Jake.

" Kyle said.

"Wake Jake?

" He laughed.

"Hah! That rhymes!

"

Noah rolled his eyes.

"Okay. He's awake. Now get lost.

"

"Wow. So testy.

" Kyle shook his head and walked away.

Dave gave Noah a look.

"It's just a game, Noah. You don't have to take that lost so hard.

"

Noah looked on, angry.

"You can say that because you didn't play! You don't know what it's like to go hitless through four at-bats! I did nothing today. Do you understand?? I'm gonna have to go to school tomorrow and face the other freshmen, who think they're better than me.

"

Dave's eyes narrowed on his little brother.

"It's not all about you, ya know. How do you think Sean will feel if he heard you? He also didn't get a hit in four at-bats. He's a first year varsity player as a sophomore. Do you think there aren't any other sophomores on jv who think they can do better than him?

"

Noah looked at his feet.

"I'm just—mad, okay?

" He looked at me.

"Not at you, Jake. Just at myself.

" He clenched his fist.

"I need to get better.

"

I didn't know what to say. I didn't know that they would lose.

"What did Zeke do?

"

"He drove in both runs.

" Dave told me.

"Zeke wasn't happy either though. He went 2-4. But with a loss...it just puts everyone in a bad mood.

"

I looked at him skeptically.

"You don't look like you're in a bad mood..?

"

Dave laughed.

"I'm still not allowed to pitch, of course I'm in a bad mood.

" He lifted his hand with the injured finger.

"It's looking good though. I'm going to ask Drew tomorrow if I can throw a light bullpen session. Just something to warmup the arm.

"

"Boysss!

" I heard Mrs. Atkins call from the bottom of the stairs.

"We better get going.

" Noah said, wiping his face one more time. He walked out, then Dave and I followed.

"Like Zeke said at the end of the game, we'll get them next time.

"

"Yea, but next time might even be harder.

" Dave sighed, putting his hands behind his head.

"They didn't even put Brady on the mound. That's how confident they were.

"

"Who's Brady?

" I asked as we made it downstairs.

"He's the best pitcher on Golden West.

" Noah told me without looking.

"I think I told you before that they have someone who throws kind of funny. That's him.

"

Throws funny?

"His style is rare. He throws submarine.

" Dave elaborated. Except...his elaboration wasn't enough.

"You guys are talking about Brady?

" Kyle asked, already seated at the table.

"They're probably saving him.

"

We sat down.

"Saving who?

" Mr. Atkins questioned as he took his seat as well. He looked at the empty seat between the twins.

"Where's Zeke?

"

"Here.

" Zeke walked in the dining room in a brisk manner. He took his seat, still dripping of sweat like he was working out.

"Ugh.

" Dave held his nose.

"You couldn't take a shower first?

"

"No, I wanted to put some more work in.

" Zeke said, eyeing the food that was already laid out.

Mrs. Atkins walked in the room with a bowl. Surprisingly, she brought it around to me, and set it down before me.

"I made you some more soup just in case your stomach still felt pretty weak.

"

"Thanks.

" I picked up the spoon, already blowing on my first scoop.

She sat down and dinner commenced.

"So who is being saved again?

" Mr. Atkins repeated.

"Oh, as I was saying, Golden West probably wants to save Brady for Servite. Coach said they play each other Saturday.

" Kyle said, loading up his plate with food.

"Does that mean they think we're weaker than Servite?

" Noah asked.

Dave nodded.

"At the very least, means that we have weaker hitting.

"

"Well with Brady pitching against them, it's likely to be a pitcher's duel. Almost like today.

" Kyle said. He stabbed his broccoli angrily.

"If only Garret didn't give up that homerun.

"

"You can't say that.

" Dave said.

"You've given up more homeruns than Garret throughout the season.

"

"I've never suffered a loss though.

" Kyle rebutted.

"Kyle.

" Mr. Atkins warned.

"You're on the same team. His loss is your loss too. The same would be said if you lost too.

"

Kyle sighed.

"Yea, I know.

"

"You boys will get a second chance.

" Mrs. Atkins said cheerfully.

"It's only one loss. Won't put you out of the race just yet. Golden West or Servite will have a loss by Saturday too. And, you'll get to play Servite twice.

"

"Mom.

" The twins groaned in unison.

"What? What did I say?

"

"You said we play Servite twice.

" Dave shook his head.

"That's not a good thing.

"

"They have a whole team of good pitchers.

" Kyle added.

"You boys are good pitchers too.

" She told them.

The twins blushed a little and focused on eating.

Seeing that they had settled down, Mrs. Atkins turned to me.

"Feeling better Jake?

"

I nodded, mouth full of soup.

"Dr. Moore left after seeing you sleep so soundly.

" She told me, looking relieved.

"I'm happy that you're doing better. Do you think you'll go to school tomorrow?

"

I nodded again. I don't see why not. It was a one time thing. A panic attack turned into a nightmare from my own anxiety. He's not my brother.