Chapter 541
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“What?”
A moment of silence swept the space.
Shortly after, I lifted my finger and pointed at myself.
“Does that mean I also got involved in a car accident, but since I’d walked around so normally, as usual, that you utterly forgot about it? Is that what you’re trying to say?” I asked. Considering the case of Ban Yeo Ryung, that could have possibly happened.
However, she shook her head, replying, “No… that isn’t…” then she kept her mouth shut, again, with a look of mixed feelings on her face.
I stared at her for a while. What did it mean by her words that my lost memory of the past was her fault? If it wasn’t caused by some external shock, the only thing possible was a psychological shock.
But was she thinking that our fight had caused that much of an impact on the state of my mind back then? How severe was our fight?
While I rambled those thoughts in my head, Ban Yeo Ryung opened her mouth.
“You should listen to this. Maybe your memories can come back if you hear what happened to us.”
I murmured in my thoughts, ‘Well, I don’t think so…’
Even though two people had the same name and appearance, they were completely different individuals. I was clearly aware of that. No matter how smart we are, we can’t do better on tests unless we flip a page, at least, once. Likewise, my memories wouldn’t return although she tells me about the story.
Sometimes, other people’s stories could feel so vivid and true that we could misunderstand them as they had happened to us, but those were just our brains creating false memories.
Looking at Ban Yeo Ryung’s troubled face, I wondered for a second. Perhaps it’s better to just hold her hands and say, ‘No matter how severely we had fought back in the days, that has nothing to do with us anymore.’
However, she would still feel uncomfortable every day, being concerned about whether we had mended our once broken friendship properly or we had just moved on anyway from myself having no memories of the past. Besides, our families kept bringing up our fight as a topic once in a while, so it would look suspicious if I told them that I completely forgot about it when everyone remembered it clearly.
Yeah, so this was indeed something that I had to confront and go through one day. Heaving a sigh, I sat straight.
To be honest, I had these feelings that the upcoming story wouldn’t be so serious to hear. You know that’s how memories worked. Things that looked substantial and weighty back in the days, especially during our childhood, later become shameful and embarrassing memories to have ourselves dealt with such difficulties.
For instance, those matters would be like who would be having the bigger ice cream between the two, or who would sit on the back seat of a tricycle. Since we were thirteen back then, the thing that happened between us would be something more serious than those. However, it would still be some immature arguments.
That was when Yeo Ryung caught her breath and uttered, “It happened such a long time ago, and since I didn’t try to bring it back to my memories after we became friends again, I wouldn’t be remembering it clearly.”
“Really, it doesn’t matter. Just tell me about it,” I replied, correcting my posture on the chair.
Well, since it was just a fight between two kids and also based on someone else’s memory, what Yeo Ryung was about to tell me didn’t make me nervous at all.
Pouting her lips a couple of times, Yeo Ryung finally detached her lips.
“As you know, we’ve been living next doors since we’re born. My parents have settled down here as a newly married couple; Your uncle used to live in this house before your family moved in. So, we had some connections anyway even before you weren’t living here yet. Prior to the move-out, your uncle had sold this house to your parents, and that’s how we became neighbors, at last. Shortly after, you were born, and we’ve been raised almost like siblings: you, me, and Yeo Dan oppa.
“Yeah, I know that too,” I replied, nodding.
That was when I suddenly realized that I never tried to compare the differences between our family histories in this world and the other world. Still, there wasn’t anything different except for Ban Yeo Ryung and the Four Heavenly Kings, so was it necessary to compare those things?
However, something soon came to my mind–the existence of someone was likely to influence on developing an individual’s personality. In that sense, a person with whom I spent most of my time in my childhood, perhaps more than my parents, would change my personality so much.
“Back in the days, you were a very calm person.”
“Me? I was calm?” I said, showing a look of embarrassment, as her words sounded like a compliment to me.
However, her facial expression didn’t seem like she was putting that out to praise me. Well, right now wasn’t the time to share words of blessing or any kind of that situation.
Ban Yeo Ryung continued, “You were calm, confident, and straightforward, so even though you weren’t very outgoing and a leader-type of a person, kids first reached out to you whenever things occurred. You’re the one absolutely on the ball.”
“No way…” I waved my hand again. To talk about my childhood, I was the most introverted person ever.
On all occasions, this apartment didn’t have many kids around my age, and even those few were close to each other, taking the same private tutoring session in which I didn’t have the chance to join it. Whether my parents couldn’t afford it or they had no interest in private education, I didn’t get along with them through the small group studies, and therefore, I felt left out of place.
Most of my relatives lived in the southwest province, far away from Seoul, so we didn’t see each other often, which made me grow up as a shy and quiet person. Perhaps the fact that I was the only child had influenced my personality too.
I was, again, very shy, and hid behind people when it was a moment to come forward or receive attention. When other kids enjoyed their opportunity to come into the spotlight, I tried my best to avoid the situation if the same thing happened to me.
From other parents, I heard things like, ‘Your parents are lucky to raise an easygoing child like you,’ but at the same time, some talked to me, ‘You seem too mature,’ or ‘Why don’t you act a little more charming?’ In fact, I mostly flipped through pages on a book when other kids were having fun at the playground.
Even when I became an elementary school kid and turned quite outgoing to get along with other kids, I preferred reading books alone to hanging out with my friends. When they called me out, I did go spend time with them and enjoyed having fun at parties, but that was just a counter to my lonely childhood times, which seemed to come from my victim mentality.
At that moment, Yeo Ryung uttered, “Perhaps, it’s because of me. This isn’t in my memories, but they say I just looked at the walls all day when I was young. Even when they asked me something, I responded after a long pause. I did hear what others told me, but my mind was always full of thoughts I guess.”
“What?” I asked in surprise with my eyes wide open.
It was my first time to hear such things about her childhood. Like other female main characters of web novels, I thought Yeo Ryung would have lived a life of a lovely and naive little girl.
Giving a pause between her words, she dropped her gaze at the floor. She then continued, “Maybe that’s why you became such a mature girl. No matter what others said or wanted me to react, I just stayed silent, sinking my head on my chest. Every time that happened, you grabbed my hand and stepped forward.”
Yeo Ryung opened and folded her empty hand.
“I have no idea why I behaved that way, but most of my memories at the time were about you holding my hand and speaking on behalf of me such as ‘Yeo Ryung is sick’ or ‘She isn’t feeling well.’ You made those excuses and ran away with me to escape the situation,” said Yeo Ryung.
Thinking about the person I had been in those days, what she just said about me was very unimaginable.