Chapter 92 : For What Reason Did She Live For

It was getting late and Wu Shi was still in the main room. So Mama Luo reminded the Old Madam, “Old Madam, it’s getting late. It’s about time for you to let Third Madam go back.”

Old Madam impatiently said, “Then, let her go back!” When Wu Shi served her today, she had made her became furious again.

Mama Luo tactfully persuaded, “Old Madam, Third Madam does not understand your painstaking efforts right now, but she will understand one day.” She knew that the Old Madam did all this not to harass Wu Shi, but to hone her.

With a headache, Old Madam said, “I don’t expect her to understand my painstaking efforts, but I just hope she doesn’t use her status as an elder to hold down the two girls while believing herself to be infallible¹Chinese idiom : consider oneself (always) in the right. Fortunately, Yuchen is still fine as she still can take the overall situation into consideration. She also won’t fuss over some small matters. But Fourth Girl’s temper, where will she let herself suffers some losses. If Wu Shi provokes her again, who knows what else will happen?“ Just like what happened last time when Wu Shi hit her, and Yuxi had made a scene from it. This had made the whole residence knew that Wu Shi had abused her, causing her reputation to be heavily discredited. It happened that Yuxi was still a victim in this case. Not only the Old Madam couldn’t punish her, she had to appease her too.

Mama Luo incredulously said, “Third Madam is not so dim, is she?” Third Madam couldn’t even deal with Fourth Miss. If she provoked Third Miss too, one wouldn’t know how the Third Madam had died.

Old Madam sighed, “It’s a pity that there is no regret medicine in this world. If I had known that Wu Shi will be like this, back in those days, I would have asked Yan-er²used as endearment to just send the children back to the capital in any way.“ When she wrote to Han Jingyan to send the children back to the capital, Wu Shi was unwilling, so she hardly insist at that time. As a result, none of the three children were actually turned out good now. Yurong was a girl, and she would be married to someone else’s family in the future, so for her, it almost didn’t matter in all aspects, but for the two legitimate grandsons…she only had a headache when she thought of their current performances. This was the result of mistakes in Wu Shi’s way of upbringing them.

As Mama Luo heard these words, she knew that Old Madam was dissatisfied with Wu Shi’s two sons. However, what had done, had already been done. It was no use to regret it now. At present, she could only persuade, “Old Madam, children have a destiny that is not necessarily shared by their parents³Chinese proverbs : children need to live their own lives. Besides, Eldest Branch of this family has a bright future, so it doesn’t matter if the Third Branch is a little bit different.“

Old Madam Han gave out a wry smile. When did the Eldest Branch have a bright future? Jianming was still pretty good. Jianye was also still good as long as he didn’t become a hindrance on somebody. Still, those two were her only hope for the bright future of the family.

Without mentioning Old Madam Han’s worries, Yuxi went to the main courtyard and told Qiu Shi’s about what had happened in today’s banquet. After she was done telling her this, she said, “Aunt, when I looked at Heshou⁴he = harmonious, shou = long lifeXianzhu⁵Princess of the Fourth Rank

/usually granted to daughter of a Junwang’s attitude today, she had treated us no different than other people. I think I might have been oversensitive last time.” The truth could not be told to anyone, even to Qiu Shi.

Qiu Shi pondered for a moment and then said, “It is better to be careful when you go out later on. By the way, you should have less contact with that Jiang girl in the future. It’s not good to be that competitive at a young age.“ Since she couldn’t always be by Yuxi’s side, she would lend her hand in reminding her instead. She wasn’t afraid to say those words even when she started to blush.

Naturally, it would be unlikely for Yuxi to create a deep friendship with Jiang Qi. “Duan Jiejie⁶elder sister and Shiya Biaojie⁷Elder female cousin were also there today, but I had been too busy to properly chat with them.” She had been with Junzhu most of the time today, so Duan Xinrong and Zhou Shiya didn’t feel good enough to come forward and caught up with her.

Qiu Shi didn’t mind about the matter that much as she said, “There are plenty of opportunities for you to speak with them later on.”

Yuxi accompanied Qiu Shi as they chatted for a long time. At last, when Qiu Shi noticed that the day had gotten dark, she let Yuxi returned to her own yard.

That night, Yuxi kept on tossing and turning in her bed, unable to fall asleep. She simply asked for Zisu to come over and had a talk with her.

Zisu felt that Yuxi was acting quite strange earlier today, but she didn’t know when would it be appropriate to properly asked her. Now that Yuxi had personally looked for her to talk, she took this chance to ask, “Miss, did something happen today?”

Yuxi replied, “Nothing happened.” After a short pause, she asked, “Zisu, why do you think people live?”

All of sudden, Zisu’s throat got choked as this question was too deep for her to answer. After thinking for a moment, she bluntly replied, “Miss, why do people need so many reasons just to live? If you are alive, then you are alive. Do you think it is okay to think about dying instead?”

Yuxi shook her head and explained, “It’s just that I don’t think it makes any sense just to live like this.” In her last life, she lived for her life, even though she lived with no dignity and suffered humiliation, she never wanted to die. But in this life, she didn’t want to live in such a muddleheaded way anymore. In this life, she would live for herself and lived wonderfully, so she would not have any regrets. This noob translation was translated by a noob translator きつね. Please read this chapter at xin-shou.blogspot.com.

Upon seeing this, Zisu became more anxious, as she asked, “Miss, is there something wrong with you? If there’s anything in your heart, don’t hold it back. Just by holding it in one’s heart, it will only bring harm to oneself.“ This Miss in her household had something that she held back deep in her heart and she didn’t want to tell anyone about them. This was really not good. Having too many things restrained in one’s heart, would likely to bring problems to oneself.

Yuxi smiled and responded, “What can you do for me? Don’t think about it. I slept too much during the day,so you go get my medical book. Just by looking at it, l will surely fall asleep!“ If she tried to force herself to sleep like this, she wouldn’t be able to sleep until dawn. Reading medical book was the best way to hypnotize people. When she read medical books, she could fall asleep in a few minutes. It was no exception today. Yuxi, who had put down her worries, fell asleep soon after looking at the medical books.

Since Yuxi slept too late last night, she overslept the next day. Zisu and Kufu both wished Yuxi would sleep more and were unwilling to wake her up. As a result, when Yuxi finally woke up, the sun was already three poles high⁸Chinese idiom : it was already late in the morning.

Yuxi didn’t say anything about this matter either. After she had washed and groomed herself up, she went to her study, then handed a written letter to Kufu as she instructed, “Ask your father to give this letter to Mama Fang.” Kufu’s father was a groom in the state residence, while her mother was the inner courtyard stewardess who was in charge of the maids. Kufu’s mother’s job was provided by Yuxi, in order for her to conveniently find out the news of the residence. The couple also helped Yuxi ran some errands.

Kufu received the letter and was about to go out when Yuxi felt that this was inappropriate again. She stopped Kufu and said, “Give me back the letter and you can go out first.”

Kufu could not understand Yuxi’s action, but she still handed back the letter back according to Yuxi’s words. “Miss, I will be right outside the door. Please let me know if you need anything.”

Yuxi looked at the letter in her hand and thought a lot about it. Finally, she decided not to deliver the letter. Heshou⁴he = harmonious, shou = long lifeXianzhu⁵Princess of the Fourth Rank

/usually granted to daughter of a Junwang might be staring intensely at her now. If she sent people asking for information about Jiang Hongjin now, all her previous efforts would be in vain.

Yuxi said to herself, “I’ve been waiting for so many years. It’s not going to be that bad if I just wait for a bit more time.” Anyway, there was still time for her to find out the truth. If she went checking about it now, in case it was exposed, it would not be pretty once Heshou⁴he = harmonious, shou = long lifeXianzhu⁵Princess of the Fourth Rank

/usually granted to daughter of a Junwang had her eyes set on her.

Yurong was placed under house arrest by the Old Madam for a month and she had finally been released. By this time, the nurturing momo⁹wet nurse had already been invited.

Only a day had passed when Yurong cried out bitterly, “Mom, my whole body hurts.” Although it hurt, she didn’t dare to say that she would not study nor change her education. She knew that she would receive severe punishment if she dared say so.

Medicated Wine

It is a transparent medicated liquid obtained by using wine as a solvent to soak out the effective components of herbs or animals, and they usually use to reinforce body fluid and nourish the blood. Most of these medicated liquors are taken orally, while some are used externally. For more info on medicated wine, you can go visit TCM Wiki.

Image Credit : TCM Wiki

Wu Shi looked at Yu Rong’s swollen knee. With her eyes brimming with tears, she took the medicated wine from the old woman servant’s hand and rubbed it gently on the swollen part.

Yurong gasped in pain, but she gritted her teeth and said, “Mom, don’t worry, I’ll learn the rules properly from Momo⁹wet nurse. Once I learn the rules, Grandmother won’t hate me anymore. At that time, she will also not make it difficult for Mom anymore.” This huge change in Yurong was hugely Qiu Yanfu’s contribution.

Wu Shi’s tears swished down, “My Rong-er²used as endearment has grown up and now knows to help Mom gets over difficulties.” She would rather have her daughter as carefree and happy as she was in Hebei, than having her child became like this. It was just that, she couldn’t even protect her baby now.

Old Madam Han soon noticed Wu Shi’s huge changes. She was so surprised that she immediately instructed Mama Luo, “Go and find out what’s going on.” She was happy to see Wu Shi got better, but her attitude had just drastically changed in one night. There must be something fishy going on.

The real person who hold the power in Duke Han of the State residence was Old Madam Han. There was nothing in the inner courtyard that she couldn’t find out about.

Mama Luo came back soon and told the story roughly, “Old Madam, this old servant has looked at this Miss Qiu quite well. She knew how to persuade Fifth Miss and can also help relieve Third Madam.” It was a pity that she didn’t know where did this Miss Qiu got in the way of Fourth Miss’ eyes, as she had been continuously ridiculed by Fourth Miss.

Old Madam sneered, “Do you think this Qiu Yanfu was really doing this for Yurong and Wu Shi? She did it for herself.” If Wu Shi and Yurong have been suppressed, Qiu Yanfu would not be able to appear in public. So when Wu Shi was suppressed by her and Yurong was placed under house arrest, the most anxious one was Qiu Yanfu.

Mama Luo then stated, “In any case, it is also a good thing that the Fifth Miss and the Third Madam can listen to her persuasion. What do you think, Old Madam?”

The Old Madam nodded slowly, “As long as she doesn’t think of any wicked idea. If she wants to climb into a good marriage with the help of the residence, I will definitely help her. Humph, if she starts to think of any wicked idea…“ She was referring to Qiu Yanfu having an idea on Han Jianye.

Mama Luo smiled and said, “It was just a chance encounter, how can we take it seriously!” She spared no effort in saying good words about Qiu Yanfu as she would receive benefits by doing so.

Old Madam did not point it out bluntly as she said, “I hope so! Speaking of which, Ye-er²used as endearment is also 16 years old this year. As for Qiu Shi, she has not yet decided anything for him after all these years.“

Mama Luo responded, “Eldest Madam also wants to find a suitable one for Second Young Master. This old servant heard that she had already chosen a candidate. It is estimated that the marriage will settle soon.“

Old Madam did not reply. Han Jianming’s wife, Ye Shi, was chosen by her, so she had no intention of interfering in Han Jianye’s marriage. However, she knew that Qiu Shi had always been filial and would definitely inform her if she had really decided on the candidate.

Han Jianye’s marriage was not only worrying the Old Madam, but also Qiu Shi herself! She couldn’t help muttering to Yuxi about how hard it was to find a suitable daughter-in-law.

Yuxi asked, “What sort of person does Aunt want to find for Second Brother?”

Qiu Shi answered, “She has to have a good look, good temper and good family background. Furthermore, your Second Brother likes gentle and soft like water kind of girl. If she meets these requirements, then she is the one.“

Yuxi almost knelt down after hearing what her Aunt had said. Weren’t these requirements too demanding? Although Second Brother was the young master of the Duke of the State residence, he was also the second son who wouldn’t inherit the title, plus he didn’t have any merit to his name yet. In addition, he had an immoral father. In fact, he did not have a lot of choices.

Yuxi considered about it for a moment and then she gave her suggestion, “Eldest Aunt, let’s put off Second Brother’s marriage first till he gains merit to his name. By then, he will have more choices in candidates for his marriage.” Although she wanted Han Jianye to settle his marriage earlier, marriage was a life-long event. If he found an undesirable one, he would be miserable all his life.

Qiu Shi then said, “Let’s take a good look at it first. Marriage is a life-long event which ought to be chosen carefully and cannot be rushed. It’s easy for the marriage to go wrong if we do it in a rush. Bad marriage will only lead to a bad life.“ She had rashly married Duke of the State back in the day and had experienced unfortunate consequences all her marriage years. That was why she had being extra cautious when it came to her son’s marriage.

Yuxi was somewhat amused. It was Eldest Aunt who had been worried and irritated all the time, and yet, it was also her who said not to worry too much. She really pitied her Aunt’s loving mother heart, “Well Aunt, take your time and may you find Ersao¹⁰second brother’s wife who satisfies you and also has kindly feelings for Erge¹¹er=second, ge=elder brother, short form of gege.”