Chapter 117
The lights in the Western courtyard of the Shen residence were all lit throughout the night.
Shen Gui and Shen Wan wanted to inquire about it, and made their own cronies to keep a watch outside the courtyard doors that not even a mosquito could enter. But to be able to inquire about what was said inside, it was easier said than done.
In the room, Shen Qiu poured a cup of tea for Shen Miao and said, “Younger Sister speak slowly.”
With regards to military affairs, the Shen family had Shen Xin, Luo Xue Yan and Shen Qiu, and Shen Miao was never involved in such matters at all. Young ladies that grew up in the far away from battle Ding capital, and perhaps even the large families in the Ding capital would not be able to understand the structure, as matters of military affairs were often indistinguishable treacherous, and would not be as simple as how it looked on the surface. Even most officials could not tell the difference apart, much less Shen Miao.
But even if Shen Miao speak of it, everything that she said was so logical, that Shen Xin and wife could not help but cast sidelong glances at one another.
“Cast away the Shen family’s army and revive the Luo family’s army.” Luo Xue Yan said, “But the Shen family’s army are all elites and the Luo family’s army…” Speaking of her own Father’s army, Luo Xue Yan was somewhat sad, “How can it compare with the Shen family’s army?”
“Even though the Luo family’s army are scattered, the most important value is its cleanliness.” Shen Miao said, “There are already traitors in Father’s Shen family’s army and to bring this kind of army into battle, how would one know if one would be stabbed at the back with a knife.”
When the words were spoken, all three became silent.
To have someone who went through life and death and was raised from a soldier to be a traitor, was indeed something that everyone did not wish to see.
Shen Xin said, “I have also thought about what Jiao Jiao had said.”
Shen Qiu and Luo Xue Yan looked at Shen Xin at the same time. At this moment Shen Xin had gotten rid of the suspicious expression, and looked at Shen Miao with some appreciation in his gaze, “An indecision will invariably lead to trouble. But previously Jiao Jiao mentioned in the horse carriage, that within two years I will definitely be recalled back to the capital. What is that about?”
“Exactly.” Shen Qiu turned his head over and looked at Shen Miao, “How does Younger Sister know that His Majesty would recall Father back to the capital within two years?”
No one could guess an Emperor’s mind and for Shen Miao to say such words, there seemed to be some meaning to it. Luo Xue Yan started to get anxious as she was thinking in the long term. Those people who could guess clearly the Emperor’s mind would definitely be Emperor Wen Hui’s people. Could it be that Prince Ding and Shen Miao matters that had been spread all around were true? Lou Xue Yan was worried that Shen Miao was involved in the muddy waters of the fight for the heir apparent, and was used as a chess piece.
Shen Miao’s eyes drooped down. Within two years, Emperor Wen Hui would need to recall Shen Xin back to the capital. This was because of Ming Qi’s tribute presentation to the Emperor, there was the Qin country on the North, and Great Liang on the West, hence like this, Ming Qi’s position in the middle was very precarious. At that time, the Emperor Wen Hui’s health was not good, the Crown Prince was lying sick in bed, Prince Zhou and Prince Li were badly bruised from fighting one another, and Fu Xiu Yi was secretly and gradually spreading his net.
As a loyal General, Shen Xin would definitely be used by Emperor Wen Hui to deter the enemies. Just like the last lifetime, even though at that time the Imperial family was suppressing the Shen family’s army, they still left a final string, and the last drop of oil was squeezed out of Shen Xin by the Royal family.
It is just that these words could not be said to the outside world, thus when facing those gazes, Shen Miao gently smiled, “I only dreamt of a very realistic dream. In the dream, within two years, Father will be able to stage a comeback, and the reputation of the Formidable Great General will not be sullied.”
In fact these words were somewhat perfunctory, but Shen Miao said them warmly with a pair of clear eyes. Even if one did not believe them, their heart would have softened.
Whether or not one will be recalled back to the capital, it was something that no one could say clearly. Be it a year or two, or even three or four, at the moment the best route was to retreat to the Northwestern region. Not only for the sake of a comeback, but because the fight for the heir apparent was currently very intense, thus if the Shen family remained in the Ding capital, even if there was no military power, it is inevitable one would still be involved. This was the logic behind drawing back wisely in the face of overwhelming odds. Prior to succeeding in one’s career, the first thing was to protect one’s family.
That was what Shen Xin wanted.
He looked at Shen Miao and smiled, “Since Jiao Jiao said that it is a dream, then that dream will definitely come true. Father trust you.” There was no intention to delve into the reason behind.
The three words ‘Father trust you’ almost made Shen Miao tear up. At the beginning she was bent on marrying Fu Xiu Yi, Shen Xin did his best to obstruct, but at the end she used death to threaten and Shen Xin finally gave in. The proud General who always gave orders showed a slumped and helpless look as he said, “Since it is the husband you choose, Father trust you.”
And so that pushed the Shen family into the path to extinction.
Shen Miao closed her eyes to make the scenes of the tragic past disappear. She said, “If Father really believe what I said, then please submit a request to His Majesty to go and guard the Xiao Chun City tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” Luo Xue Yan was surprised, “Why the rush?”
“It must be done in a rush, so His Majesty would think that Father is dissatisfied that the military tally was confiscated from him, and it was done in a fit of anger. Then he would not think more of it.” Shen Miao explained.
Shen Qiu wanted to say something but Shen Xin made a brief order, “Then it will be done as such.”
“Shen Xin.” Luo Xue Yan was somewhat anxious, after all, this matter was such a major thing. Although Shen Miao had spoken some truth, but to make such a decision hurriedly, it was indeed too hasty.
Shen Xin shook his head, “You and me have been in the battlefield for so many years, and yet could not see as clearly as Jiao Jiao.” He looked at Shen Miao and his gaze became a little more complex, but at the end he reached his hands out and rubbed Shen Miao’s head, “If Jiao Jiao was a male, only a few people could be comparable.”
Shen Miao quietly looked at him.
Today all the things she had said, were what an unmarried daughter would not be able to think about. What kind of person Shen Xin was? Even though he was a rough person, it did not mean that he did not have brains, and one fear that he had seen many dubious points. It is just that Shen Xin did not reveal this and even if it was revealed, Shen Miao would not tell Shen Xin the secret of her rebirth. Perhaps this was an unconditional trust between loved ones.
Just like her previous lifetime, Shen Xin always stood by her side.
“The Shen family will be fine.” Shen Miao pledged.
“Tomorrow morning, Father will submit a memorandum.” Shen Xin smiled and stood up as he pulled Luo Xue Yan up, “It is better for Furen to rest early.”
Luo Xue Yan actually wanted to say something but when she saw Shen Xin’s expression, she kept quiet. She had followed Shen Xin for so many years, and naturally knew Shen Xin’s confidence was always soaring, and have not seen him in such a solemn appearance. He was supposed to be a hero admired by everyone, but was now deprived of military power and about to guard a small territory. No one was more upset than Shen Xin at this moment of time. For the first time she yielded, and supported Shen Xin, “Alright.”
It was Shen Qiu who stayed behind and kept murmuring as he looked at Shen Miao. He finally could not stand it and said, “Younger Sister, do you want Father to rebel?”
In the Shen family, Shen Qiu was the one who was the most clear of Shen Miao’s vicious tendencies. Prince Yu of the First Rank coveted her, and she did not left a living soul in the Prince Yu’s residence. The Jing family schemed against her and now ended up dead without an intact corpse. The Emperor took away the military tally from the Shen family, was Shen Miao’s actions of seemingly retreat, truly just for self-protection?”
“The wealth of the Monarch, the worry of an Emperor.” Shen Miao smiled lightly. “The Shen family has all the while been loyal to the Monarch and love the country, so how can such a thing happen? It is better for Eldest brother not to think too much, if there are ears in the wall and others heard about it, one fear that both you and me will have troubles.”
Shen Qiu paused before speaking, “That is the best, Younger Sister must not do foolish things.” He then turned around and walked out of the room.
Shen Miao slowly sat down.
To rebel. She really wanted that, but how to rebel without leaving a bad name was an important thing. The current top priority was naturally to avoid a calamity. But when one return back, one would definitely give a big gift to the Fu family.
One only hoped that the Fu family could swallow it down.
The matter of Shen Xin being deprived of military power, only bustled for a day before it was covered by new rumours the second day. There were always new happenings in Ming Qi, thus this scene was not something new. However the rumours that were circulating in the marketplace on the second day, were still about Shen Xin.
One heard that on the second day after Shen Xin’s military tally was confiscated, he had submitted a memorandum to Emperor Wen Hui in front of all the civil and military officials, and proposed to bring the remaining front section and the scattered Shen family’s guards and move to the Xiao Chun City to guard.
The once outstanding and glorious Great General actually wanted to guard a small city. Others all felt that it was something unimaginable, and thought that Shen Xin was nursing a grievance. To take the initiative to submit a memorandum when nursing a grievance, meant that he felt unhappy with Emperor Wen Hui’s punishment, and made a decision in a rage.
The storyteller in the restaurant talked about the matter very clearly and logically, saying that Emperor Wen Hui’s expression immediately changed and threw that memorandum onto Shen Xin’s face, but Shen Xin still stubbornly demanded to retreat to the Xiao Chun City. How would a monarch be able to tolerate a person who act out rashly, even if one had great contributions, it was all useless. Since he wanted to retreat to the Xiao Chun City then good, he will stand guard there.
So the news that the Formidable Great General will leave the capital tomorrow, and head to the Xiao Chun City was known to the entire Ding capital.
Almost everyone in the restaurant were talking about the matter. Some felt that Shen Xin did the correct thing, since the Formidable Great General no longer was in command of the forces, and would be nursing a grievance if one still stayed in the Ding capital, thus it would be better to go far away, to avoid being disgusted by the situation. Some felt that Shen Xin was held too high up, and did not know the complexity of things. It was he who first lied to the Monarch, had luckily safeguarded his life, and now even dared to make such a face to Emperor Wen Hui. If Emperor Wen Hui was not kind and if it was other monarch, one fear that there would be an even heavier punishment awaiting.
In Kuai Hou Lou, Ji Yu Shu was holding his chin as he looked at Gao Yang, “Say, what is Shen Xin’s meaning behind leaving the Ding capital, and not caring about the Shen family’s army?”
“If it is so, then it is really somewhat courageous and not the reckless conduct of a military crude.” Gao Yan sighed, “After all, there is not anyone who can make a quick retreat before a crisis.” After drinking a mouthful of tea, Gao Yang then spoke to Xie Jing Xing, who was being quiet at the side, “Why are you not speaking?”
Xie Jing Xing was interrupted and looked back at both of them, “The Shen family moved too fast.”
“Fast?” Ji Yu Shu did not understand.
Xie Jing Xing played with the cups in his hands, and a faint smile appeared on the corner of his lips. He pointed out a road to Shen Miao to let the Shen family have a retreat route, but did not think that the Shen family’s actions would turn out to be so fast. It was only yesterday that the military tally was stripped away, and today a request was put up in court to withdraw and maintain guard. Shen Xin was a steady person, thus Shen Miao must have definitely said something to Shen Xin, for him to make such a choice in such a short period of time.
On the surface Emperor Wen Hui let Shen Xin pack up and leave tomorrow from the capital to embarrass him, but one did not know that his own thoughts were actually seen through by the little girl in the Shen family. If one was to be aware of it, not sure what kind of taste would there be in his heart. Xie Jing Xing had a feeling that Shen Miao perhaps, would occupy a great important role in the game of Ming Qi but to him, who would be soon leaving the capital, it was of no importance.
“Yu Shu will follow me and leave the capital.” He said, “Gao Yang, the remaining things will be handled by you.”
Ji Yu Shu rubbed his nose and revealed a big of excitement, “Good. Third Xie Older Brother, the chefs that makes snacks here, really make them just too horrible to eat. Third Older Brother’s chef is still the best, one will not need to go hungry.”
Gao Yang rolled his eyes at him and said coldly, “You have eaten everywhere in the Ding capital, which day did you go hungry?” After finishing, he put on a solemn look and said to Xie Jing Xing, “Do not worry, leave the matters here to me.”
Xie Jing Xing nodded his head.
Those news naturally had spread out to other places. The Shen family was a big family in the Ding capital, and there were many colleagues that kept contact with them, there were even some who came because of Shen Xin’s prestige, and some of those officials just came to fawn. But when a wall was about to collapse, everyone would give it a push, when the tree falls, monkeys would scatter, and no sooner when a person left, the tea would cool down. This time Shen Xin was considered to be demoted and leaving the capital, so other than the few families that had really good relations with Shen Xin and came to bid farewell, there was no one else.
Shen Miao took a trip to Guang Wen Tang.
Since one was to leave the capital, naturally one could no longer attend Guang Wen Tang. Some time ago because of Shen Miao’s change of temperament, most of the students in Guang Wen Tang were somewhat afraid of her, but now because the military power of the Shen family was confiscated, some unscrupulous persons started to ridicule her. It was just that Shen Miao walked past them without even turning, as if she did not hear them at all, making those aristocratic children feel bored.
When Feng An Nin saw her, she started crying as she grabbed onto her sleeves, “What to do? Shen Miao, once you leave, when will you return?”
Shen Miao was somewhat helpless with Feng An Ning’s tears. To be fair, in her previous life because she was stupid, all the noble females of the the Ding capital were not willing to be associated with her, thus she was cold hearted in this lifetime and deliberately did not make any moves to gain anyone’s likes. One could say that this Feng An Ning accidentally became her only friend. Even though she had an arrogant character, her heart was not bad and sometimes when Shen Miao looked at her, she would think of Wan Yu.
She comforted, “Will be returning not very long later.”
“Liar.” Feng An Ning cried, “I heard Father saying that this time General Shen had angered His Majesty. And if His Majesty is currently angry, how could one return quickly? Shen Miao, you must write me letters, one do not know if I would have been married when you return.”
Shen Miao almost laughed out, but upon seeing Feng An Ning’s red crying eyes, she did not. She knew clearer than anyone else the Feng family’s and Feng An Ning’s ending. Even though two years later the Feng family would not yet collapse, she said to Feng An Ning as she patted her shoulder, “Nothing will happen. I will get to see you when you marry.”
Feng An Ning seemed to want to say something, but saw Pei Lang coming in while carrying a book. Pei Lang was wearing green and stood on the stage. When his eyes landed on Shen Miao, he paused before saying, “Shen Miao, take a walk with me.”
If Shen Miao were to leave Guang Wen Tang, she ought to say her goodbyes to the Teacher, Pei Lang. Everyone did not find anything wrong with this, thus Feng An Ning unwillingly released Shen Miao’s sleeves and let Shen Miao follow Pei Lang out of the class.
Pei Lang brought Shen Miao to a triangle courtyard in Guang Wen Tang. The teachers in Guang Wen Tang stayed in the academy’s residence, and this was Pei Lang’s own courtyard that no one would enter. He pushed the door and entered the nearest study, Shen Miao followed behind before closing the doors.
“You are leaving.” This time Pei Lang did not speak in a roundabout manner like usual, and questioned in a straightforward manner.
Shen Miao nodded her head.
Pei Lang’s expression changed and he hesitated before speaking, “Liu Ying’s matter.”
“Young Lady Liu Ying has been settled down.” Shen Miao interrupted his words, “She is living well in the embroidery workshop. Her double-sided embroidery is originally outstanding, thus she could become an embroidery master who is valued for her skill. Perhaps she will be able to gain a few apprentices.”
Pei Lang’s expression gradually relaxed. Shen Xin and family were about to leave the capital, so he feared that Liu Ying’s matter was not dealt yet.
He was relaxed but saw that Shen Miao was staring at his eyes when she spoke, “Then how about the matter that Teacher Pei is considering?”
Pei Lang was startled.
The matter that Shen Miao mentioned was naturally about him being a spy by Fu Xiu Yi’s side. That day at Kuai Hou Lou, Pei Lang had already showed his attitude on the matter, but as to how the plan was to be carried out, one would need to think about it further. Hearing that, Pei Lang frowned, “What you want to say?”
“Two years.” Shen Miao said, “Within two years I will definitely return back to the capital. By that time, Teacher Pei must become His Highness Prince Ding’s advisor, and become the most relied upon.”
Pei Lang smiled but there was some anger in that smile, “Shen Miao, are you not valuing me too highly? I am only just a poor scholar and have nothing. Even if one was lucky to be associated with His Highness Prince Ding, how would one be the most relied upon?”
“Teacher need not be unduly humble. Teacher is a fine steed, naturally there will be a scout who could appreciate.” Shen Miao smiled gently, “If one is not a fine steed, in order to let the scout appreciate, one must view oneself as a fine steed.” Her voice was lowered as she provokingly looked at Pei Lang, “If Teacher is unable to do it, why do not you guess how I would tell Liu Ying the story of Prefectural Magistrate Pei, and would also mention that the mastermind of all of it was Teacher. Does Teacher Pei think that Young Lady Liu Ying will be so touched that tears will fall?”
“You.” Pei Lang was exasperated. Shen Miao’s remark was clearly a threat, indicating that if he did not become Fu Xiu Yi’s right-hand man, the entire matter will be told to Liu Ying. Liu Ying still had resentment over that matter from years ago, and if she was told of how it was arranged, Liu Ying might even return to Bao Xiang Lou in a fit of anger.
Pei Lang said, “I have never seen such a vicious and cunning female like you.” The young female in front did not have an attitude of a junior when talking to a senior, and did not honour the teacher or respect his teaching. Pei Lang even had the delusion that Shen Miao was always suppressing him every time. She provoked and threatened, and it also contained some kind of inexplicable grievances that put Pei Lang in tough straits. Who could have thought that this gentle and delicate looking little female, would have a heart scarier and harder than a married woman who live deep in a household.
“Teacher is joking. The ways of the world are difficult, one is just struggling to survive.” Shen Miao laughed modestly, as if she was a disciple who was accepting a teacher’s admonishment, but wordlessly took out a thing from her sleeves, and reached over to Pei Lang’s sleeves before handing it over to him.
Pei Lang was stunned for a moment as those soft fingertips touched his wrist, but after a light moment the sensation disappeared, as if it was the wing of a butterfly. In a curious coincidence, Pei Lang actually had an impulse to stay that way but it was only for a moment, and when he woke up, he felt a letter like thing before looking at Shen Miao puzzled.
“If Teacher is free, naturally one can go over to Young Lady Liu Ying’s embroidery workshop to take a peek. In addition, there are also some other things inside. Hope that Teacher will do accordingly within two years.”
Pei Lang’s body stiffened but he did not get angry and laughed instead, “Shen Miao, you want me to be your puppet.”
“A scholar has the lofty and unyielding character of a scholar, and Teacher is of a great erudition and scholarship that this student respect. If it was other scholars, then this student would not use such a method.” Shen Miao raised her head up and looked at Pei Lang somewhat angrily, but there was a smile on the corner of her lips, “But does Teacher have any choice in the matter?”
“It is alright for Teacher to refuse but even if there are a thousand mountains and ten thousand rivers, I will naturally have a way to tell a story to Liu Ying.” She smiled gently but her words were sharp.
The fire in Pei Lang’s heart started burning and he felt inexplicably uncomfortable. In front of Shen Miao, he did not have any of the dignity of a Teacher at all. Every time he wanted to get angry, he would not be able to do so when he saw Shen Miao’s complacent appearance. Pei Lang even wondered what kind of debt he owed Shen Miao in his past life, that Shen Miao was collecting now.
He suppressed the humiliation in his heart and said, “Just doing what this indicate, one will meet your requirement?”
“I believe in Teacher’s ability.” Shen Miao’s eyes hanged down. That letter, it contained everything that Fu Xiu Yi had been doing for these few years. He looked like he had no ambition on the surface, but he had been recruiting a number of talented scholars. As to what kind of methods were used to unearth these intelligent people, no one was clearer of them than Shen Miao. Pei Lang was not an ordinary person, thus he only need to show a little of his ‘talent’ and naturally he would be able to get into Fu Xiu Yi’s radar.
And to gain Fu Xiu Yi’s attention, one would require a step by step strategy. In that letter, Shen Miao did not indicated wheat Pei Lang should do, but only indicated the moment of opportunity for Pei Lang to get closer to Fu Xiu Yi. As to how one could gain his trust, it would depend on Pei Lang himself.
This was the greatest confidence Shen Miao could give to Pei Lang.
In the previous lifetime Fu Xiu Yi and Pei Lang were people on the same boat, but now she was the first to have talent scouted this fine steed, and had left a footprint on this talent. One must also let Fu Xiu Yi have a taste of being betrayed by the people closest to him.
She swept a look at Pei Lang and her heart suddenly felt some worries. Since things had been briefed, she did not want to speak more with Pei Lang so she turned around to leave.
“Shen Miao.” It was Pei Lang who stopped her and he hesitated for a moment before he finally spit out two words. “Take care.”
Shen Miao was somewhat surprised but only said faintly, “Many thanks.” She then left after that. Only Pei Lang was left standing and his gaze was complicatedly fixed on Shen Miao’s back.
When Shen Miao left Pei Lang’s courtyard, she saw a soft white dumpling standing in the garden outside the academy and upon seeing her, that pair of eyes brightened as it ran over and cried in surprise, “Older Sister Shen.”
Su Ming Lang rolled over like a dumpling.
Shen Miao, “…”
In fact, Su Ming Lang had passed his tenth birthday. One did not know if the Su family raised him too well, that he was different from his matured but still young Older Brother, as Su Ming Lang looked even more childlike than a five or six year old. He ran a few steps and was out of breath so Shen Miao walked to him and held his chubby hands, “What is the matter?”
“Older Sister Shen, you are leaving?” Su Ming Lang whimpered for a while, “I will wait for you here obediently till you return, alright?”
Shen Miao froze. After everyone knew that Shen Xin would be heading to the Xiao Chun City, the first words were either ‘when you will return’ or ‘is it that you will not be returning’. Everyone always feel that this time once Shen Xin leave, perhaps he would be staying in the Xiao Chun City forever. Su Ming Lang’s first words was to wait for her return, as if he was assured that Shen Miao would certainly return back to the Ding capital. Shen Miao felt interested and tapped on his head before deliberately teasing him, “Who say that I will return? Perhaps I will not come back.”
“Would not?” Su Ming Lang looked up and made a solemn vow, “Older Sister will definitely return.”
Shen Miao looked at him from the side of her head. When Su Ming Lang spoke those words, his eyes were firm and there was no trace of doubt, so she asked, “Why are you so sure?”
“Older Brother Xie said that you will definitely return before two years.” Su Ming Lang said excitingly.
Older Brother Xie. Shen Miao’s mind turned, Xie Jing Xing.
“Even though Father and Eldest Brother all think that once Older Sister and family leave, one would not know when will you return. Father also say that this time General Shen had angered His Majesty, and one fear that His Majesty would never recall General Shen this lifetime.” Su Ming Lang was a child whose words carried no harm, and he did not pay attention if his words would hurt Shen Miao, and only said as he wished, “But when Older Brother Xie came to visit Eldest Brother, he said to Eldest Brother that General Shen will inevitable return to the capital within two years.”
Shen Miao felt some horror in her heart of how Xie Jing Xing, could actually guess so accurately what was in her mind.
“Even though Xie Older Brother is very bad, he bullies me, also bullies my Eldest Brother and also bullies my Father but everything he says will become true.” It was the first time Su Ming Lang spoke so nimbly, as if to prove something. He continued, “He said that you will return, so you will definitely return. Older Sister Shen, you will return, right?” After he finished speaking, he was looking at her with eyes filled with hope.
All of a sudden Shen Miao thought about Fu Ming and her heart softened as she smiled, “He said correctly. I will return.”
“That is great.” Su Ming Lang jumped up and pulled his index finger out before saying each word, “Then I will wait here for Older Sister’s return. When Older Sister returns, I will treat Older Sister to candied hawthorn, dough figurine, steamed sugar cake…”
Shen Miao could not help but laugh again. Being with Su Ming Lang seemed to sweep away all the dark and hazy emotions instantly. It was as if time became carefree and without worries. She said, “You just have to listen to your Father’s words. It is just that these words you said to me today about me returning, you must never tell another person about it.”
If others heard these words, when it spreads out and gets told to Emperor Wen Hui, one might be able to discover tiny traces. In this word, it was alright for one person to know of her mind, but it would not be good if there were many.
Su Ming Lang saw Shen Miao’s solemn face and immediately spoke obediently, “Understand. I only said it to Older Sister and will not tell to others.” Then he softly said to Shen Miao, “Older Sister Shen, you also must not tell Older Brother Xie about these words because I eavesdropped them. If Older Brother Xie know that I eavesdropped him, he will beat me up again.”
In the Second Young Master Su’s eyes, the graceful and noble Little Marquis Xie was an out and out black-hearted bandit.
Shen Miao agreed, “Alright, would not tell.”
Translator’s comment: I hearts Su Ming Lang!!! So freaking adorbs… Can I have one of him?
Ed: No, you’ll eat him and they will sell those like him by the pound, no amount of donations can cover that T_T