Chapter 334: South Park (9)
The Head of Homeland Security had gone off the deep end, and no one could stop him from exposing his own conspiracy.
“You see, for thousands of years, hordes of creatures have lived in the guinea valley of Peru. The Incas learned how to keep the creatures at bay… by playing pan flute music. Guinea creatures hate it even more than humans do,” he explained in detail. “But the prophecy foretold that… one day, the creatures would be unleashed, and… I have made that happen.”
The people around looked at him in shock. Perhaps they did not understand why… this person was openly sharing his plan with them.
“The Incas predicted that the world would be saved,” the Head of Homeland Security said sarcastically, “by Craig. But that part of the prophecy will not come true, for you will all die on this mountain!”
Before he finished, the gun had been fired. A soldier who stood behind the Head of Homeland Security fired and tried to kill this culprit behind the tragedy. The bullets pierced the man’s chest. He looked at the bullet holes like he had just realized he had been shot. But not one drop of blood came out from the wound.
“Ha… Hahaha…” The Head of Homeland Security started to laugh mockingly.
“You… you’re some kind of monster,” another soldier exclaimed, pointing at him.
“Oh… I am much more than that,” the Head of Homeland Security answered calmly. “Guinea bees, guinea rabbits, guinea saurus, guinea rexes… I am something much worse.”
Suddenly, his face began to contort, and his mouth was pried open to an unbelievable size. The next second, a visible streak of red lightning passed through the surface of the Head of Homeland Security’s body. His skin was being pushed open as if from inside. In just three seconds, this monster that had been masquerading as the Head of Homeland Security showed its true form.
It was… a guinea pirate—a giant guinea pig wearing a pirate costume.
“Arr!” The guinea pirate responded with the typical pirate greeting, as if his identity was not clear enough from his appearance.
“Ah, a guinea pirate!” One of the government officials screamed as he ran for cover. Once again, perhaps this was to remind the viewers what the Head of Homeland Security actually was, as if all the other hints were not clear enough.
“Jesus Christ!” Stan shouted.
“Sir, I promise you, I am not going to ruin your plan. I’ll just walk away, see?” Craig said calmly as he walked to the side.
As he walked away, Craig accidentally stepped on a stone plate with black and white carvings. When he stepped on it, the plate started to glow in blue and then spun into the sky. At the same time, the golden statue’s eyes started to glow in the same blue light. The short staff in his right hand shot out a golden ray at the stone plate. When the stone plate was hit, Craig’s eyes glowed and shot out two blue light beams. The kid did not do anything; he just stood where he was, but the two light beams automatically shot toward the guinea pirate.
“Ah! No!” The guinea pirate groaned in pain.
“Okay… now there are sparks shooting out of my eye…” Craig used his even tone to narrate this impossible situation sardonically.
“Arr, curse yee, Craig!” The guinea pirate crumpled to the ground and groaned one last time. The four from the Department of Homeland Security and the four main characters looked at the events before him in stunned shock. When the monster lost its life, the light beams stopped shooting out from Craig’s eyes and the stone plate under his feet returned to their original place. Craig walked away from it, with no words, just a deep sigh…
So far, everything had gone as Feng Bujue remembered it from episode ten and eleven of season twelve of South Park. Based on the plot, the officials from Homeland Security would soon contact the headquarters. The Peruvian Flute Bands would be released, and the calamity of the guinea creatures would be over by dawn.
But…
“Sandbox 022986 event is over.
“Mirror Screen has lost its effect.
“Cloned scenario will be destroyed in six hundred minutes by the system.
“Members under level three are requested to return to the inner world immediately.
“Level four members are encouraged to use the remaining time to destroy as much data as you possibly can within the scenario.
“Good luck to all of you.”
At that moment, all the Anomalies that were residing within in this ’cloned scenario’ heard these messages.
…
At the same time, Feng Bujue was discussing how to assemble a Peruvian Flute Band with the main characters of the scenario. Suddenly, there was loud static in his mind.
“What is going on?” This was something he had not experienced since he started playing this game. “Where’s this sound coming from?”
Feng Bujue had no idea whether he was hearing this or it was transferred through some other kind of method. His first reaction was to check the game menu to see if he was affected by some debuff, but he soon realized that everything was fine with him. Yet, for some weird reason, the words in the quest tab had all turned into random code.
“What is going on?” Feng Bujue said. “Has the quest system collapsed?”
A loud boom interrupted his thoughts.
Brother Jue looked to the sound. About ten meters away, a large chunk of the ceiling dropped down, and a human who descended from the sky was standing amid the pooling dust.