Chapter 167 - Triple Absurdity
Translator: Exodus Tales Editor: Exodus Tales
Chapter 167 – Triple Absurdity
Transdimensional Store Recommended Products (Refreshes at midnight every day.)
1. Painless Gender Conversion Processing Bed: Produced by the Tellore Company in 2158. The bed comes with a 60-liter high-concentration liquid hernia. Users can freely set the parameters for breast uplift and contraction, laryngeal knot enlargement and shrinkage, bone grinding, and hair removal. Users can painlessly convert their genders within 45 minutes by themselves. The selling price is 85 points.
“I freaking knew it!”
After snapping out of his daze, Chen Yu covered his face in agony.
Not only was the Transdimensional Store’s first recommendation an absurd product, but out of all things, why did it have to be a gender converter?
“What is going on with my mind…”
Hurriedly, he swiped his finger across the watch and looked toward the second product to cleanse his eyes with.
2. Cockroach Milk Generator: Produced by the Fierce Cattle Dairy Co., Ltd. in 2067. After placing a large number of live cockroaches into the built-in crushing furnace, the machine will filter, disinfect, crush, and squeeze the cockroaches to obtain fresh cockroach milk that is rich in protein and vitamins. Under the same volume, cockroach milk provides 3-4 times the energy that ordinary milk offers. This is a product created for those who are lactose intolerant! The selling price is 67 points.
“Dammit! What are these things?!”
Chen Yu was going crazy.
Under normal circumstances, it wouldn’t have mattered even if the Transdimensional Store recommended nonsensical products. After all, he had the final say in purchasing these items. However, the main problem was that the store only recommended products based on the subconscious thoughts in his brain… This was something he couldn’t tolerate.
After remaining in a daze for a long time, Chen Yu sat up and turned toward the third product.
“I believe my brain is healthy and normal…”
3. Appealing Skirt: Produced by the Romantic Beauty Apparel Company in 2118. A short lily skirt that is hand-woven from silk. There is an electronic pheromone generator attached to the back of the waist strap. When activated, the generator generates pheromones that stimulate all human males’ cerebral cortex within 10 meters, giving them an uncontrollable urge to flip the skirt. If this skirt is worn on a street with foot traffic of 200 people per hour, there is a 92% chance for someone to flip the skirt. The selling price is 40 points.
Chen Yu: “…”
Standing up, Chen Yu walked out of his bedroom.
“Big Brother! Play with me!” Chen Erke, who was hugging the husky, hurriedly approached Chen Yu when she saw him.
“There’s something wrong with Big Brother’s head, so stay away. I don’t want to hurt you…”
After shooing his little sister away, Chen Yu walked into the bathroom and turned on the sink faucet. He then thoroughly washed his face before staring at the mirror with dull eyes.
After a while, he turned on the faucet again and poured some water into his ears.
“If I get some water into my brain, I should have a clearer mind.”
While mumbling to himself, Chen Yu returned to his bedroom. He then returned his attention to his watch and flipped toward the fourth product.
4. Invisibility Cloak: Produced by the Hyperstealth Company in 2205. The cloak adopts the principle of the pellicle mirror. The main body is made of nano-supramolecular textile material, and the cloak weighs a total of 130 grams. The cloak can effectively guide light around the surface of the object it is covering to achieve a stealth effect. The cloak does not retain any light that can be recognized by the human eye, and it also negates weak X-ray scans. The selling price is 85 points.
“Thank the heavens!”
Chen Yu nearly broke into tears.
“Finally, something normal! This is what I want!”
Without hesitation, Chen Yu tapped on the screen and purchased the Invisibility Cloak.
94 points expended (product tax). Remaining points: 193
As the text flashed across his screen, space in his room immediately distorted, which was followed by the appearance of a space-time wormhole. A flat, white box then fell out of the wormhole.
Chen Yu waited for the wormhole to disappear like always before he went forward to pick up the box.
“Mr. Chen, did you buy something fun again?” Little Peach ran over with sparkling eyes.
“Is having fun the only thing you know how to do?”
“Mhm.”
“…”
Ignoring the robot beside him, Chen Yu excitedly licked his lips and removed the box’s seal.
When he opened the box, he found that the inside was completely empty.
Scratching her head, Little Peach asked, “Did you buy a box?”
“Heh.”
Chen Yu chuckled. Without giving an explanation, he reached into the box and grabbed the Invisibility Cloak inside. When he lifted the cloak, his arm immediately disappeared…
“Wow!” Little Peach exclaimed in surprise.
“Awesome, right?”
“Yes!” Little Peach nodded repeatedly. “How did you cut off your arm?”
“…Are you really an artificial intelligence?”
“That’s right.”
“Please go back to writing codes. This isn’t a toy,” Chen Yu said as he did his best to stay calm.
“Oh, okay.”
After seeing his robot obediently sitting before the computer table, Chen Yu turned his head away. He then stroked and inspected the cloak’s fabric before carefully placing it over his body.
His field of vision…went dark.
“Huh? I can’t see what’s outside if I put it on my head.”
Vaguely sensing that something was amiss, Chen Yu quickly removed the cloak.
He then draped the cloak across his shoulders, and sure enough, the effects were excellent. Everything below his shoulders had turned invisible.
However…
“I think I got scammed.” After falling silent momentarily, Chen Yu angrily bellowed, “This thing is still showing my head!”
“Huh?” Little Peach turned around when she heard Chen Yu’s words. Immediately, she exclaimed, “You cut off your whole body?!”
Hurriedly walking to the mirror, Chen Yu pulled the cloak up and down his head several times. In the end, he came to a conclusion.
Sure enough, he got scammed…
There was a massive flaw in this cloak’s design!
If he wanted to become fully invisible, he couldn’t see the outside world. If he wanted to see the outside world, he would have to reveal his head…
“Hmm… I think there’s a way around this.”
After pondering before the mirror for some time, he thoroughly covered himself with the Invisibility Cloak once more. He then used his watch to manipulate the invisible camera.
Immediately, the scene of the outside world appeared on his watch’s screen.
“Ahahaha! Sure enough, I have great wisdom!”
Bending down, Chen Yu started slowly creeping forward. With the camera’s guidance, he could now move without restrictions. “With this item, I won’t have to spend money to visit the bathhouse anymore. Awesome…”
After circling around his room, he approached Little Peach and asked, “Hey, dimwit. Can you see me?”
Turning around, Little Peach could not help but be stunned when she looked at the direction Chen Yu’s voice came from. She then reached out with her fingers and touched the cloak, asking, “Are you here? So you became invisible?”
“Can you see me?” Chen Yu repeated his question.
Her eyes suddenly turning red, Little Peach answered, “I can see your infrared image. The temperature of your lower abdomen is above average. You should urinate.”
“…” Removing the Invisibility Cloak, Chen Yu indifferently pointed at the laptop and said, “Continue working.”
“You should really urinate…”
“Work.”
“Okay.” Little Peach pouted as she turned around.
After donning the Invisibility Cloak once more, Chen Yu walked toward his bedroom door and gently opened it. He then flew the camera out of the room.
Currently, Chen Erke was drawing with her crayons alone in the living room.
A hint of playfulness appearing in his heart, Chen Yu cautiously approached Chen Erke.
Looking at Chen Erke’s drawing paper through the camera, Chen Yu discovered that his little sister was drawing a large crab that was brandishing its claws. However, the strange thing was that the crab was standing on a spiderweb… Seeing this, he could not help but be confused as to whether Chen Erke was drawing a crab or a spider.
When Chen Yu was within three meters of the sofa, Chen Erke suddenly sensed something and abruptly turned toward Chen Yu’s direction.
What the? Chen Yu’s nerves tensed up. He was so surprised that he had subconsciously held his breath. Can she see me?
“…”
“…”
For a time, the two siblings stared at each other through the Invisibility Cloak…